Wants Dinner Comic Strips
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197 Results for Wants Dinner
View 1 - 10 results for wants dinner comic strips. Discover the best "Wants Dinner" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday June 30,
2004
Tags #Wally, #hits on hire, #crazy mess, #problems, #asks to move in, #wants dinner
Transcript
wally: "Your life is a rolling disaster, so I figure I should ask you for a date." "I'm hoping that the source of your problem is that you consistently make poor choices." "Maybe you could buy some groceries and make me a nice dinner." "Would you like to move in with me?"
Sunday April 24,
2011
Tags #fraternization, #joking, #agenda, #know anything, #important he is, #like his jokes, #late for dinner, #jokes, #table, #meeting, #laughter, #business
Transcript
Boss: The first thing on the agenda... Dilbert: Hold on. I don't know anything about this guy. Boss: What's the difference? Dilbert: I need to know how important he is. Should I pretend to like his jokes? Should I nod in agreement no matter what he says? Man: You can call me anything. Just don't call me late for dinner. Dilbert: Ha ha ha ha ha!! I hope I didn't waste that.
Thursday March 22,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #blind date, #biggest, #woman, #chance, #financially, #surviving, #dinner, #eat, #starch, #pasta, #banned, #life
Transcript
The caption says, "Dilbert greets his blind date." Dilbert thinks, "This is the biggest woman I've ever seen." Dilbert says, "Uh . . . Hi." Dilbert thinks, "I have only one chance of financially surviving dinner." The woman says, "Hi." Dilbert says, "Say . . . Why don't we go to the 'All-you-can-eat House of Starch and Pasta?'" The woman replies, "Can't . . . Banned for life."
Monday May 21,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #dinner, #car, #drive, #woman, #shallow, #difference, #parking lot, #thump, #mighty, #chest
Transcript
Dilbert asks a woman, ". . . So, would you like to meet after work and go to dinner?" The woman asks, "What kind of car do you drive?" Dilbert says angrily, "Ugh! You women are all so shallow!! It should not make one bit of difference what kind of car I drive!!" The woman replies, "Except that it will help me find you in the parking lot . . . But you could just stand on top of it and thump your mighty chest."
Tuesday May 22,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #woman, #dinner, #love, #witch, #break the ice, #small talk, #witchcraft
Transcript
Dilbert walks next to a woman and thinks, "I can't believe she agreed to have dinner with me." In the restaurant, Dilbert pulls out the woman's chair and thinks, "I'm afraid to say anything to spoil this moment . . ." Dilbert thinks, "I guess I should say something to break the ice." The woman asks, "Did I mention that I'm a witch?"
Thursday May 24,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #witchcrat, #handy, #annoying, #luv, #frog, #fly, #dinner, #date, #love, #Women
Transcript
Dilbert and a woman sit at a restaurant table eating dinner. Dilbert asks, "So . . . Uh . . . Why did you decide to take up witchcraft?" The woman replies, "It comes in handy." The woman points to a fly circling the table and says, "For example, suppose I want to get rid of this annoying fly here." The woman turns Dilbert into a frog and says, "Now be a luv . . ."
Wednesday August 28,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #step, #outside, #smallish, #side, #kick, #fight, #butt, #wants, #piece, #accidentally, #soak
Transcript
Dilbert and some co-workers sit at a conference table. A tiny man says to Dilbert, "I disagree with everything you said. Who wants to step outside and fight about it?!!!" The little man says, "I may be on the smallish side but I can kick any butt in this room!!" The short man continues, "C'mon, who wants a piece of me??!" A woman next to Dilbert whispers, "It's my fault. I accidentally used him to soak up a coffee spill this morning."
Wednesday March 23,
1994
Tags #date, #lisa, #coffee at work, #wash hair, #saturday night, #dinner date, #rejected, #clean hair
Transcript
Dilbert: Lisa, I was wondering if you'd like to go to dinner saturday night. Lisa: Uh...I have to wash my hair saturday. how about having coffee here at work instead? Dilbert: I'll pass. I was hoping for someone with clean hair.
Thursday April 07,
1994
Tags #crash test dummies, #dilbert gets political, #dinner party, #gourmet cooking
Transcript
dilbert gets political Dilbert: Id love to have you and whats her face come to my little dinner party. Dilbert: I like to do a little gourmet cooking...when I'm not raising money to battle unpopular diseases. Carol: Is it just me or are the other guest crash dummies? Dilbert: Its just you.
Friday June 24,
1994
Tags #nineties woman, #man pay dinner, #slap a man, #threatening
Transcript
LIZ: I'm a nineties kind of woman. I demand equality but the man must pay for dinner. "And recent surveys show that many women my age think it's okay to slap a man." DILBERT: "Really? Did they name the man?" LIZ: "Don't make me come over there."