Corporate Art Source Comic Strips

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185 Results for Corporate Art Source

View 1 - 10 results for corporate art source comic strips. Discover the best "Corporate Art Source" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 24, 1989's comic on:


Tags #joke, #pun

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The caption says, "Dogbert demonstrates the art of puns. Step #1: 'The Set-up.'" Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dogbert says, "Tell me again about your uncle the famous biologist." Dilbert says, "Uncle Albert won many awards for his work in breeding sea anemonies. Sadly, he had little time for a social life." The caption says, "Step #2: 'The Delivery' (from outside of swatting range)." Dogbert stands in the doorway and says, "With anemonies like that, who needs friends?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 05, 1989's comic on:


Tags #joke telling, #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #beer, #cactus, #timing, #jokes

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The caption says, "Dilbert demonstrates the art of joke telling." Dilbert and Dogbert sit on chairs across from each other. Dilbert says, ". . . So the first guy orders a beer and a cactus . . ." The caption says, "A good joke teller will seek to establish a pattern." Dilbert continues, ". . . Then the second guy . . . Heh, heh . . . Orders a beer and a cactus . . ." The caption says, "Tomorrow's lesson: timing." Dilbert continues, ". . . So then the seventy-third guy comes in . . ." Dogbert is asleep.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 11, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #corporate, #philosophy, #shoot, #messenger, #consulted, #engineering, #department, #launched, #ill-conceived product, #humiliated, #fired, #eileen, #document, #carpet

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Dilbert stands at the front of the room giving a presentation. A man sitting at the conference table says, "Be candid, Dilbert. We have a corporate philosophy that says we 'don't shoot the messenger.'" Dilbert replies, "Good." Dilbert points to a diagram and says, "Had you consulted with the engineering department, you never would have launched such an ill-conceived product." Dilbert continues, "It is doomed to fail. You will all be humiliated and probably fired." A woman holding a rifle shouts, "Can't I just wing him?!!" A man says, "No, Eileen, that's not our philosophy." Dilbert arrives at home with tar and feathers on his body. He tells Dogbert, "It turns out the corporate philosophy is a very flexible document." Dogbert says, "You're getting tar on the carpet."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 26, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #painter, #painting, #art, #landscape, #outside, #interrupting

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Painter: Excuse me... Sir? I'm trying to paint this view. Would you mind not walking right in front of me? Dilbert: Oops. Sorry. Painter: It's already too late.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 27, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #corporate, #takeover, #complete, #hostile, #bid, #meowco, #cat, #Food, #company, #efficient, #hassling, #ashamed, #hairball

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Dogbert sits at a table holding a document. He tells Dilbert, "Plans for the corporate takeover are complete." Dilbert asks, "What corporate takeover?" Dogbert replies, "It's a hostile bid for control of the Meowco Cat Food Company." Dogbert explains, "When I become CEO, I'll order them to add a hairball to every can of cat food." Dogbert chuckles. Dilbert says, "That is cruel and senseless. I'm thoroughly ashamed of you." Dilbert leaves the room. Dogbert sits on the hassock and thinks, "Gee . . . It seems so much more efficient than hassling one cat at a time."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 25, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #painting, #creepy, #follow, #currator, #art, #news, #newspaper, #home

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A man points to a painting and says to Dilbert, "Notice how the eyes seem to follow you." Dilbert moves his head and says, "Wow, that's a weird effect." The man says, "It gets better." Dilbert sits in his chair reading the newspaper. The eyes from the painting followed him home and are sitting on the window sill.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 22, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #campaign, #censor, #opera, #forms, #art

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Dilbert asks Dogbert, ". . . What if you succeed in your campaign to censor opera?" Dilbert continues, "Before you know it, somebody will try to censor other forms of art." The text balloons above Dilbert's and Dogbert's heads are blank.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 14, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #dollars, #inventing, #secret, #better, #classify, #send, #space, #stuff, #kill, #smoking, #drugs, #open-minded

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The strip is titled, "Dogbert's guide to your tax dollars." A vacuum cleaner sucks up dollar bills. Dogbert says, "Did you ever wonder how all that tax money gets spent? Roll the tape." The caption says, "Inventing secret things." Two scientists look at a device. One of them says, "It doesn't look like much, but it'll smart like crazy if you sit on it." The caption says, "Sending secret things into space." The other scientist says, "Maybe we'd better classify it secret and send it into space with the other stuff." The caption says, "Education." A teacher says, "Sex will kill you, food will kill you, smoking will kill you, alcohol will kill you, drugs will kill you . . ." The children sitting at their school desks look frightened. The caption says, "Art grants for things you aren't open-minded enough to appreciate." Dilbert looks at a shoe sitting on a pedestal. The artist says, "I call it 'The Bug I Hated.'" The caption says, "Advanced health care." Two doctors stand next to a bed where a skeleton lies. One physician says, "You were right, Benson. X-rays and microwaves are not the same thing." The caption says, "Paying Congress." A senator says, "Our raises came through!" Another says, "I think I'll send myself a thank-you note!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 20, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #butterfly, #bug, #flying, #much, #now, #kill, #flatten, #becomes, #beautiful, #work, #art, #guts, #wings, #evenly, #spaced, #ants, #pants, #mother, #nature, #standing, #resist

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Dilbert and Dogbert sit in the bushes. Dilbert points and says, "Look! A beautiful Regency butterfly!" Dogbert says, "Beautiful?? It's a flying BUG." Dilbert says, "It may not seem like much now . . ." Dilbert continues, "But after we kill it, dip it in chemicals, and flatten it between glass, it becomes a beautiful work of art!" Dogbert asks, "Do we throw away the bug guts and just keep the wings?" Dilbert replies, "No. The guts keep the wings evenly spaced." Dilbert screams and yells, "Ants in my pants!!" He jumps out of the bushes. As Dilbert runs away, a woman comes out of the bushes. Dogbert says, "Mother Nature!" Mother Nature says, "He was standing right on an anthill. I couldn't resist."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 05, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #pencil, #excalibert, #sharpener, #corporate, #legend, #ceo, #grovel

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A man says to Dilbert, "You did it! You removed the pencil 'Excalibert' from the sharpener." The caption says, "As corporate legend required, Dilbert became CEO." Dilbert holds Excalibert and three men bow to him. The caption says, "He immediately set about the task of making important decisions." A woman hands Dilbert a list and says, "Here's the list of people who didn't grovel sufficiently."