Drop By Iq Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

63 Results for Drop By Iq

View 1 - 10 results for drop by iq comic strips. Discover the best "Drop By Iq" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 30, 1989's comic on:


Tags #mother, #mother nature, #rake, #Family

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands in the yard raking leaves. Someone shouts, "Hey! Drop the rake!!" Dilbert asks a woman, "Who are you?" The woman replies, "I'm Mother Nature, wiseguy, and I don't remember asking YOU to shuffle my dead twigs around." Dilbert replies, "Uh . . . Gosh, I was just trying to tidy up a bit for Spring . . ." Mother Nature grabs Dilbert by the shirt and shouts, "Are you saying you don't LIKE my housekeeping!!" Dilbert sits on the ground and says, "But I . . ." Mother Nature says, "That's it. No dinner for you tonight, and I'm sending locusts to eat your house."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 05, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #cashier, #celebration dance

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert walks through the cafeteria holding a tray of food. Dilbert thinks, "Oh no, not this cashier again. She always hands back my change right over my soda. I just know she's trying to make me drop a dime in my drink." Dilbert stands at the cashier and waves his hand over his drink saying, "No! No! No!" The cashier thinks, "Fake left . . ." Dilbert says as he eats his lunch, "It's not the coins in the soda that get me; it's that darned celebration dance she does."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 05, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #Frank, #eddy, #self-esteem, #damaged, #immune system

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert walk down the sidewalk. A man walking in the other direction says, "Hi, Dilbert." Dilbert says, "Hi, Frank." The man says, "My name is Eddy, not Frank." Dilbert replies, "Oh . . . Right. Sorry, Eddy." Dilbert thinks, "This is so embarrassing." Eddy says, "Forgetting somebody's name is the worst insult in the world." Eddy continues, "Now my self-esteem has been damaged. My job performance will drop accordingly, and I'll be fired." Eddy shivers and says, "The stress is starting to affect my immune system. I'm getting a cold." Dogbert holds out his paw and says, "I'm Dogbert. Nice to meet you, Frank."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 03, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #bright, #fellow, #mensa, #genuis, #iq, #local, #chapter, #smart, #intelligence, #practical, #application

View Transcript

Transcript

A man with a large head says to Dilbert, "You seem like a bright fellow; have you considered joining Mensa?" Dilbert asks, "Is that the group with genius IQs?" The man replies, "Precisely correct. I'm president of the local chapter." Dilbert asks, "If we're so smart, why do we work here?" The man replies, "Intelligence has much less practical application than you'd think."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 02, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #respects, #wrong, #drop, #ambiguity

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert and Ratbert sit on a hassock. Ratbert says, "Dogbert, sometimes I think you're the only one who respects me." Dogbert replies, "Wrong." Ratbert thinks, "Maybe I should drop it while there's still some ambiguity."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 22, 1992's comic on:


Tags #the boss, #dave, #haircut, #management, #fast-track, #program, #hair

View Transcript

Transcript

Dave sits at his desk. The Boss enters and says, "Dave, I hear that you've started cutting your own hair . . ." The Boss continues, "I'm afraid I'll have to drop you from the management fast-track program." The Boss walks away thinking, "Lucky we caught that one before he got too far."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 11, 1993's comic on:


Tags #alice, #artificial, #band, #creatures, #Dogbert, #dominant, #dominants, #engineers, #envelopes, #females, #gray, #groom, #mist, #native, #note, #the boss, #vegetation

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert's journal entry says, "A small band of the creatures were known to live high in an artificial structure." The panel shows an office building. Dogbert's journal says, "On my way to study them I took note of the native vegetation." Dogbert stands in an office wearing a backpack. He feels a potted plant and thinks, "Rented." His journal says, "The younger males were at play. They became self-conscious when watched." Dogbert watches a man playing computer games. Dogbert's journal says, "The dominant male had a gray back. He controlled the others by waving little envelopes." The Boss waves paychecks at the employees and they bow to him. Dogbert's journal says, "There were few females in the group. The less dominant males had no chance of mating." Dilbert and Wally watch a woman walk past them. Dogbert's journal syas, "Unlike other species they head no instinct for grooming." A man asks, "Want to groom?" Wally replies, "Drop dead." The journal says, "My time was up, but I will miss them, those . . ." Dogbert walks toward the elevator. The journal concludes, "Engineers in the mist." Wally asks Dilbert, "How long are you supposed to microwave popcorn?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 22, 1993's comic on:


Tags #lawyer, #Dogbert, #lawsuit

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits at a table with a lawyer. The lawyer says to Dogbert, "If you do not drop your class action suit, then you'll have to face ME in court." The lawyer continues, "And I've never lost a case." Dogbert says, "Then how do you know you wouldn't enjoy it." The man replies, "Well . . . I just wouldn't." Dogbert says, "Good argument."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 29, 1993's comic on:


Tags #the boss, #Dilbert, #Wally, #alice, #communication, #management, #office culture

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss tells Dilbert, Wally and Alice, "What we need is more communication between management and . . . Whatever you are." The Boss continues, "So, once a month I'll have 'open door day.'" The Boss explains, "You can drop by and whine about anything you want." The Boss continues, "I'll listen with a concerned expression like this." The Boss continues, "Then I'll explain why everything is fine just the way it is." The Boss continues, "Then, morale will improve, profits will skyrocket and my stock options will make me RICH!! Dilbert says, "May I make some observations about your plan?" Dilbert says, "Uh . . . Forget it." The Boss asks, "Do you notice how concerned I look?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 08, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #coffee, #office

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss reaches for the coffee pot and thinks, "I'm the Boss. I can take the last bit of coffee without making a new pot." The Boss yells, "Look at me!! I'm taking the last drop!! Ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!" Dilbert says, "An actual human would feel guilt in this situation." The Boss says, "The pot needs washing."