Switched Identity Comic Strips
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36 Results for Switched Identity
View 1 - 10 results for switched identity comic strips. Discover the best "Switched Identity" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday April 08,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #hero, #suit, #identity, #secret, #super, #powers, #acquire
Transcript
Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I made a super hero suit for myself." Dogbert asks, "Why?" Dilbert puts the suit on as he says, "You never know when you might accidentally acquire super powers. It happens all the time." Dilbert, who is now wearing a suit with a cape and a letter "D" on the front, continues, "This way, my identity can remain a secret." Dogbert says, "I suddenly see why that's so important."
Friday January 15,
1993
Tags #Dilbert, #ratbert, #hug, #sneak, #Family, #rat, #leg, #old spice, #Wally
Transcript
Ratbert hides behind the chair thinking, "There's Dilbert . . . I'll sneak up and hug his leg until he loves me and accepts me in the family." Ratbert jumps on Dilbert as he leaves the house. Ratbert says to Wally, "A rat is clinging to my leg." Wally replies, "I had that problem till I switched to 'Old Spice.'"
Friday May 26,
1995
Tags #boss's ignorance, #advantage, #impresses him, #accomplishments, #barney suit, #secret identity
Transcript
Dogbert says to Dilbert, "You must learn to use your boss's ignorance to your advantage." Dogbert continues, "Find out what impresses him and list it on your accomplishments." Dilbert sits across from the Boss's desk. The Boss reads a document and says, "You're the actor in the 'Barney' suit?!! I love that guy!" Dilbert says, "Don't tell anybody my secret identity."
Monday October 21,
1996
Tags #cartoonits, #goat herder, #good points, #newbie identity, #technology, #technology bigot
Transcript
Dilbert types, "On the surface, you seem to make some good points about technology . . ." Dilbert types, "But your e-mail address reveals your newbie identity. You're probably a goat herder or a cartoonist." Dilbert sits on the couch and Dogbert sits on the backrest. Dogbert asks, "How does it feel to be an elitist technology bigot?" Dilbert says, "I prefer to think of myself as a technology 'have.'"
Sunday February 23,
1997
Tags #dread, #staff meeting, #describe accomplishments, #amazing success, #wally ville, #ass fell asleep
Transcript
The Boss, Wally, Dilbert and Alice sit at a conference table. The Boss thinks, "I dread this part of the staff meeting." The Boss says, "Let's go around the table and describe our accomplishments for the week. Wally?" Wally replies, "It was another week of amazing success in Wallyville." Wally continues, "On Monday I realized my left bun had fallen asleep." Wally continues, "I was shocked. The 'Boys' had always worked as a team before." Wally leans to the side and continues, "Thinking quickly, I shifted my weight to my right bun and hoped for the best." Alice says, "That's your left side, not your right." Wally replies, "That's the other thing; apparently the boys switched sides sometime during the night." The Boss covers his face with his hands.
Monday December 08,
1997
Tags #compliments, #compliments list, #everything you say, #lower opinion, #analyze identity
Transcript
Dogbert and Dilbert go for a walk. Dogbert says, "When you're with a woman, everything you say will lower her opinion of you." Dilbert says, "But, I can give her compliments, right?" Dogbert's ears standon end. He says, "No! That's the worst thing." Dogbert says, "Women keep a log of all compliments. They analyze the pattern to identify negative trends." Dilbert says, "Should I use my real name?"
Saturday April 16,
2005
Tags #victime, #identity theft, #wander, #strangers underpants
Transcript
The Boss: The police say I'm a victim of identity theft. The Boss: "Now I am doomed to wander the earth without knowing who I am." Dilbert: "That would mean you're wearing a stranger's underpants." The boss: "GAAA!"
Wednesday April 12,
2006
Tags #security software, #upgrade it, #hackers, #steal identity, #bank accounts, #destroy hard drive, #cjoices
Transcript
DilMom "Your security software is out of date..." "Uh-oh." "Would you like to spend the rest of your natural life trying to figure out how to upgrade it?" "Erk!" "Or would you prefer to let hackers steal your identity, drain your bank accounts and destroy your hard drive?" "I need more choices!"
Sunday December 10,
2006
Transcript
"This is Dogbert's tech support. How may I abuse you?" "I get an error message every time I open an application." "Try giving me all of your personal information and then checking into rehab." "Then I'll have someone steal your identity and move in with your wife." "There's a good chance that the new guy will know how to fix your computer." "When you get out of rehab, talk your wife into taking you back." "Then never touch your computer again because it hurts the ones you love." "How's work?" "Everyone wants to talk to my supervisor."