Two Women Comic Strips

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View 1 - 10 results for two women comic strips. Discover the best "Two Women" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 26, 1989's comic on:


Tags #walking, #hallway, #dignity, #Sports

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Dilbert walks down the hall thinking, "Oh no . . . If this guy turns left when I go right, we'll end up walking down the hall right next to each other." The man turns and walks next to Dilbert. Dilbert thinks, "I hate this . . . A huge, empty hallway and here we are synchronized like two of the Rockettes." Back at home, Dilbert tells Dogbert, ". . . So that's when I knocked on the ladies' room door, yelled 'janitor' and ducked inside." Dogbert says, "At least you maintained your dignity."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 02, 1989's comic on:


Tags #heck, #shame, #minor

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Dilbert says to Phil the Ruler of Heck, "Gosh, I thought 'Heck' was just a figure of speech." Phil replies, "Yeah. A lot of people think they can get away with minor infractions." Phil says, "According to my records, last month you deliberately asked for THREE little ketchups at McDonald's when you KNEW you only needed TWO." Dilbert says, "I knew that would come back to haunt me. Look, I still have the extra one. I'll give it back!" Phil shakes his spoon at Dilbert and says, "Shame shame . . ."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 04, 1989's comic on:


Tags #dog, #girlfriend, #single, #animals, #relationships

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Dilbert sits at his desk with paper and a calculator. Dilbert says, "Ah hah! Just as I suspected." Dilbert shows Dogbert a piece of paper and says, "Here it is: mathematical proof that attractive single women exist only in white Volkswagen Rabbits and aerobics classes." Dogbert asks, "How do you explain Vanna White?" Dilbert says as he walks away, "I wonder if Isaac Newton had a dog." Dogbert adds, "Or a girlfriend."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 07, 1989's comic on:


Tags #embarrassment, #restaurant, #fancy

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Dilbert and Dogbert enter a restaurant called "Chez de Whales." Dilbert says, "This is a very fancy place, Dogbert, so don't embarrass me." Dilbert tells the maitre d', "Uh . . . Two please. Non-smoking." The maitre d' replies, "I'm afraid, monsieur, that jackets are required." The maitre d' says, "You may wear these complimentary house jackets while you dine." The maitre d' continues, "You must also wear these beaver hats and clown feet." Dilbert and Dogbert put on the jackets and hats. The maitre d' says, "Next time messieurs will remember their jackets." Dogbert says, "Looks like we narrowly avoided embarrassment."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 17, 1989's comic on:


Tags #fashion, #different, #notice, #control, #bold

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Dilbert asks Dogbert, "Notice anything different, Dogbert?" Dogbert replies, "Uh . . ." Dilbert says, "I'm wearing THREE pens, not just two." Dogbert says, "That's a pretty bold fashion statement." Dilbert replies, "I guess I was out of control."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 30, 1989's comic on:


Tags #computer, #Women, #personality, #technology, #psychology

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Dilbert sits at his desk. Dilbert says, "There . . . My program proves that pretty women have extremely bad personalities." Dilbert continues, "This is based on the input that pretty women are never nice to me." Dogbert asks, "Why does the screen say 'or you are a geek?'" Dilbert replies, "Darn! I thought I fixed that bug."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 09, 1989's comic on:


Tags #aliens, #secret, #selfish

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Two aliens who look like cows travel toward earth in a spaceship. Dilbert sits at his desk. The doorbell rings. Dogbert says, "I'll get the door." Dogbert opens the door and sees the two aliens. One of the aliens says, "Greetings, earthling. We are an advanced race from the planet Moothron." The alien continues, "We came to share our secrets for ending hunger, poverty and disease." Dogbert asks, "What's in it for me?" The aliens look at each other. The aliens get in their spaceship and fly away. Dogbert sits on the hassock and says, "I'll always wonder if there was a better way to handle that."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 18, 1989's comic on:


Tags #dinosaurs, #joke, #pun, #puns

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Dilbert: I can't believe it; all this time I thought dinosaurs were extinct, but they were just hiding in my house. Hello, A-1 Exterminator? I have dinosaurs... what kind?... I don't know. I've only heard them... Dinosaur: Thesaurus. Dilbert: Maybe a Thesaurus or two... hello?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 26, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #dinosaurs, #ripping, #flesh

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Dilbert says to Bob and Dawn the Dinosaurs, "Okay then, if you two dinosaurs want to continue hiding in my house you have to observe the house rules." Dilbert continues, "Let's see . . . Uh . . . Remain out of sight . . . Don't leave the lights on when you're out of the room . . ." Dilbert asks, "Am I forgetting anything, Dogbert?" Dogbert replies, "How about 'No ripping the flesh off the other residents.'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 02, 1989's comic on:


Tags #human, #garlic bread, #restaurant, #no pets, #cats

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Dilbert and Dogbert, who is wearing a hat, walk into Scaparotti's Restaurant. There is a sign in the window that says, "No pets." Dilbert says to Dogbert, "Just try to act human." Dilbert says to the waiter, "Two ravioli supremes and garlic bread." Dogbert adds, "And a cat . . ." Dilbert says, "That's 'catsup,' my friend would like some CATSUP." Dogbert says, "Maybe something Siamese."