Winning Argument Important Comic Strips
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Dilbert sits at the table reading the newspaper. Dogbert asks, "Which would you prefer: winning a million bucks or getting hit in the lips with a dead mole while you sleep?" Dilbert replies, "Uh . . . The money." Dogbert says, "Well, that's too bad, because you didn't win a million bucks." Dilbert turns toward the reader and says, "That's the kind of hypothetical question that can keep you up all night."
Dilbert sits at his desk. Dogbert walks into the room and says, "It's contract renewal time." Dilbert asks, "What contract?" Dogbert replies, "The owner/pet contract; ours expires at midnight." Dilbert says, "Gosh. I don't even remember signing the original one." Dilbert reads the contract and says, "Let's see . . . 'The pet's responsibility is to obey the owner's commands, no matter how humiliating.'" Dilbert reads, "'The owner's responsibilities include yelling at the pet and acting important.'" Dilbert says, "Okay, I'll si. . . Wait a minute . . . My name is typed in under 'PET'!!" Dogbert thinks, "So close . . ."
Dilbert sits at his desk holding up a broken ruler. Dilbert asks Dogbert, "Dogbert, do you know what happened to my good ruler?" Dogbert answers, "Rulers are made to be broken." Dilbert stares at Dogbert. Dilbert turns back to the desk and says, "I just KNOW there is some flaw in that argument . . ."
Dilbert swings at a ping pong ball and misses as it bounces off the ping pong table. Dilbert says, "You win, again. I sure wish I knew how you make that shot." His opponent answers, "Supernatural forces." Dilbert asks, "Really? Supernatural?" Dogbert whispers, "The mental game is SO important."
Dogbert sits on the hassock. He hears, "Boink-ouch! Boink-ouch! Boink-ouch!" Dogbert gets off the hassock and walks toward the noise. Dilbert lies face-down on the floor with juggling pins around him. Dogbert says, "Maybe juggling isn't your sport." Dilbert says, "It's not winning that counts; it's how you play the game."
Dilbert stands in front of the dresser mirror tying his tie and Dogbert sits on the bed. Dilbert says, "I've got a blind date with the lady who works at the library reference desk." Dogbert asks, "What if she's ugly?" Dilbert replies, "Looks aren't important. She sounded very smart over the phone, and I'm attracted to intelligent women." Dogbert says, "Oh . . . right." Dilbert sits at a table in a restaurant with a woman who has a huge head. Dilbert asks, "Uh . . . Should I talk, or will you be reading my thoughts directly?"
Dilbert sits at his desk reading a memo. Dilbert reads, "Urgent memo to all employees:" Dilbert says, "Uh-oh. Looks important." Dilbert continues reading, "If we are to remain competitive, you must proactively improve quality on all actionable items!" Dilbert says, "Wow! That was inspiring. My heart is pounding. I'm all tingly . . . I'd better take the rest of the day off . . ."
Dilbert sits at his desk holding a device that looks like a gun. Dilbert says to Dogbert, "This could be my most important technical achievement yet. I'll call it the 'Sonic Obliterator.' Hmm . . . Catchy." Dilbert explains, "This baby can blast a buffalo into random particles in about half a nanosecond." Dilbert continues, "Of course, it might have limited application around the house." Dogbert says, "At least the buffalos will show us some respect."
Bob and Dawn the Dinosaurs stand in a cave watching their egg. Dawn says, "Our egg is starting to hatch!!" Bob says, "C'mon egg! Push! You can do it by yourself!!" Dawn yells, "Kick it! Kick it!" Bob asks Dawn, "Should we help?" Dawn replies, "No, it's an important lesson on life." The baby in the egg thinks, "So far it stinks."
Senator Newt Axxes' Office. Senator Axxe: Mister Dogbert makes a strong argument for banning opera. Man: The polls show that almost nobody cares about this issue... There's virtually no political risk in embracing it! Senator Axxe: Until they scrape your festering corpse out of that chair!