Negotiator Comic Strips

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15 Results for Negotiator

View 1 - 10 results for negotiator comic strips. Discover the best "Negotiator" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 15, 2017's comic on:


Tags #job, #scope, #negotiating, #engineer, #demands, #failure, #stress, #business, #engineering

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Boss: We need to cut our budget. Go to all of our vendors and tell them to reduce their prices. Dilbert: Why would they do that for us? Boss: Tell them we'll buy from someone else unless they do. Dilbert: That's what we told them to get the prices we have now. I'm an engineer, not a professional negotiator. Your plan has failure designed into it. Your poor leadership already has me on the edge of madness. This could push me over the edge. Boss: And I need it done by Tuesday.

New Hire Makes More

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New Hire Makes More - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 13, 2017's comic on:


Tags #wages, #salary, #compensation, #fairness, #negotiation, #confrontation, #money

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Dilbert: I just found out that the new hire makes more than I do. Boss: It isn't my fault that you're a terrible negotiator. Dilbert: I don't like confrontation. Boss: I know. It saves me a lot of money. Shoo!

Tina Gives Buy In

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Tina Gives Buy In - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 05, 2016's comic on:


Tags #negotiation, #money, #price, #cost, #value

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Dilbert: I need everyone's buy-in on my project. Tina: You can have my buy-in for $25. Dilbert: Ted only charged me $15. Tina: It isn't my fault that Ted is a bad negotiator.

Asok Meets His Equal

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Asok Meets His Equal - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 14, 2016's comic on:


Tags #accuse, #label, #racist, #sexist, #negotiation, #clever, #outsmart, #money, #salary

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Asok: I love being the best negotiator in the entire department. Alice: You're not. Asok: Are you being racist? Alice: Are you being sexist? Asok: I have met my equal. Alice: Tell your equal I said hi when you pull your head out of it.

Asok Is The Only Good Negotiator

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Asok Is The Only Good Negotiator - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 12, 2016's comic on:


Tags #accuse, #eric scott, #haggle, #lable, #money, #negotiating, #negotiation, #racism, #racist, #raise, #guest artist

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Asok: Did you both negotiate huge raises with our boss the way I did? Dilbert and Wally: No. Dilbert: Apparently, you're the only good negotiator in the department. Asok: Are you being racist? Dilbert: I will give you $1,000 to never say that about me again.

Boss Is Bad Negotiator

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Boss Is Bad Negotiator - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 11, 2016's comic on:


Tags #haggle, #money, #negotation, #negotiating, #raise, #salary, #trick, #eric scott

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Asok: I just learned that our boss is a bad negotiator. Wally: How bad? Asok: I just negotiated a 3.3-million-dollar raise for myself. And I want 80 percent of the raises you two get because I told you. Dilbert and Wally: 75 percent is our final offer!

Bad Negotiator

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Bad Negotiator - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 18, 2016's comic on:


Tags #temperature, #disagreement, #negotiation, #compromise, #thermostat

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Alice: It's freezing in here. Dilbert: I'm hot. Put on a sweater. Alice: Why am I the one who has to change? You should wear a sweater made of ice packs. Dilbert: It's time to admit I'm a bad negotiator.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 06, 2008's comic on:


Tags #coropoaret raider, #nine dollars, #tough negotiator, #eight dollars, #hat, #elbonians

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An Elbonian says, "A corporate raider has offered to buy our company for nine dollars." Another Elbonian says, "We should ask for more." The first Elbonian says, "He's a tough negotiator." The first Elbonian says, "Now it's only eight dollars?" Dogbert says, "And I want you to do something in your hat."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 04, 2005's comic on:


Tags #police action, #neotaiotor, #evaluation form, #surrender

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Police Negotiator "SURRENDER NOW AND YOU WON'T GET HURT!!!" "Here he comes." BAM BAM BAM "I'll leave an evaluation form. Please let us know how we're doing." "Done deal."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 03, 2005's comic on:


Tags #my hat, #can't see, #perfect for job, #reverse psychology, #potentail jumpers

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"I understand that you have an opening for a negotiator who deals with potential jumpers." "I can't see you because my hat is in the way, but you sound perfect for the job." "Your reverse psychology didn't work." "What reverse psychology?"