Afraid Of Commitment Comic Strips
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84 Results for Afraid Of Commitment
View 1 - 10 results for afraid of commitment comic strips. Discover the best "Afraid Of Commitment" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday July 07,
2021
Personal Growth
Tags #pandemic, #positive, #personal growth, #lockdown, #afraid, #fear, #prison, #life of crime, #attraction, #empathy, #people, #screen faces
Transcript
dilbert: one positive thing about the pandemic is all the personal growth i had during the lockdown. for example, i'm no longer afraid of going to prison, so... a life of crime is more attractive than ever. dogbert: did you lose your empathy for other people? dilbert: you mean the screen faces?
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Monday March 18,
2019
Boss Does Research On Internet
Tags #internet, #searching, #secret, #unbelievable, #nonsense, #afraid, #truth
Transcript
Boss: I was doing some research on the internet... Dilbert: Uh-oh. Boss: And I learned that there is a secret cia base inside the sun, but no one is talking about it. Dilbert: Maybe you shouldn't do research on the internet. Boss: Why are you afraid of the truth?
Tuesday December 04,
2018
Afraid Of Alice
Tags #employees, #engineering, #fear, #request
Transcript
Tina: Did Alice find the data I need? Dilbert: Why don't you ask her? Tina: I'm afraid of her. Dilbert: You're not afraid of me? Tina: I've seen you try to lift a box of printer paper. Dilbert: Paper is heavier than it looks.
Sunday September 02,
2018
Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #google, #data center, #software, #fix, #agile
Transcript
Dilbert: I put together a plan for our data center project. The Boss: We don't need a plan we're an agile company. It's better to move fast and fix our mistakes as we go. Dilbert: You're thinking of software. Where the cost of mistakes is low, this is a construction project. The Boss: That data center will be full of software, will it not? Dilbert: Yes, but... The Boss: Don't be afraid of change. Dilbert: What if I rapidly make a plan and tell you I didn't? Is that agile enough for you? The Boss: I'll need to google that.
Tuesday November 15,
2016
Humidity Is Wrecking Hair
Tags #hair, #humid, #bad hair day
Transcript
Alice: The humidity is wrecking my hair. Please don't stare. Dilbert: I can't promise that. Alice: You're staring! Dilbert: I'm afraid to turn my back on it.
Thursday March 31,
2016
What The Family Would Think
Tags #work ethic, #interview, #lying, #deception, #commitment, #honesty, #guest artist, #donna oatney
Transcript
Man: If you hire me, I will dedicate 100 percent of my energy to making this company succeed! Dilbert: What would your family think if they heard that? Man: They'd understand. They're all huge liars, too.
Thursday February 04,
2016
Asok Returns From Fbi
Tags #racism, #arrest, #terrorist, #terrorism, #protest, #friendship, #relationship, #commitment, #apathy, #relationships
Transcript
Asok: The FBI held me for three weeks on suspicion that I was a terrorist. I assume you were protesting outside the FBI building the entire time and they didn't tell me. Because racism? Dilbert: Oh, right. Yes. We were protesting the entire time.
Friday January 08,
2016
Wearing Gloves To Handle Spreadsheet
Tags #numbers, #math, #blame, #messenger, #education
Transcript
Dilbert: My boss asked me to show you some numbers he put together. CEO: Why are you wearing gloves? Dilbert: I'm afraid to get it on my hands.
Wednesday January 08,
2014
Tags #emotional well being, #hug, #managers & supervisors, #rodents, #touch a rat, #around neck, #exercises, #business
Transcript
Boss: Experts say I can increase your engagement by caring for your emotional well-being. I would give you a hug, but I'm afraid of getting whatever made you this way. But I am willing to touch a rat that touches you, and that's not nothing. Wally: Put it on my neck.
Tuesday May 28,
2013
Tags #complaining, #fear, #opinion of plan, #rip off arms, #track down family, #kill family, #india, #Advice, #giving advice
Transcript
Asok: I'm afraid to give Alice my opinion of her plan. Dilbert: What's the worst thing that could happen? Asok: She could rip off both of my arms and beat me to death with them. Then she could track down my family in India and kill them one by one. Is this your first time giving advice? Dilbert: I just figured out why no one ever asks for it.