Bags Of Soil Comic Strips

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24 Results for Bags Of Soil

View 1 - 10 results for bags of soil comic strips. Discover the best "Bags Of Soil" comics from Dilbert.com.

Wally's Air Bag

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Wally's Air Bag - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 10, 2014's comic on:


Tags #air bags, #laziness, #work ethic, #underpants, #accidental asignments, #system, #offcie, #work, #employees, #business

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Wally: I added air bags to my underpants to avoid accidental assignments. Boss: Hey, Wally, I need you to... BAM! Maybe I'll ask someone else. Wally: The system works!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 03, 2013's comic on:


Tags #hypocrisy, #respect, #succeed, #treat each other well, #video recording, #google glasses, #recording confidential info, #fired, #insulting, #final check, #name calling, #ironic

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CEO: We only succeed when we treat each other with respect. Are you video-recording me with those Google glasses? Dilbert: Huh? CEO: You're fired for recording a confidential meeting! Pack your bags, you worthless piece of garbage! I got your final check right here! Dilbert: These are my regular glasses. Having cleared that up, you were saying something about respect? CEO: Settle down, four-eyes. This isn't over.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 24, 2013's comic on:


Tags #cruelty, #inventions, #joking, #meat bags, #robot, #capability, #humor, #learn humor

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Robot: Hey, meat-bags! I'm here to take your jobs! Ha ha! Not really. I won't have that capability for two or three years. Dilbert: When did you learn humor? Robot: Humor? I was going for cruelty.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 29, 2013's comic on:


Tags #baby, #falls, #game, #management fast track, #money, #money bags, #punch wessel, #rescuing plastic baby, #test, #weasel, #greed, #failed test

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Catbert: Your first test on the management fast track involves rescuing a plastic baby and a bag of money from a weasel. You must punch the weasel then catch the money and the baby before they reach the ground. I found our next CEO. Wally: Wait...say this instructions again.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 26, 2012's comic on:


Tags #inventions, #robot, #telepresence, #commute, #multitasking, #new technology, #rough patches, #meat bags

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Asok: Here comes Wally's telepresence robot. Robot: How was your commute, suckers?!!! Ha ha ha ha! I'm multitasking in ways that might surprise you! Dilbert: New technology always has rough patches. Robot: Open that door for me, meat bags!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 10, 2011's comic on:


Tags #honesty, #meat, #question and answer, #meat bags, #boss and emplyee, #realtionship, #office

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Dilbert says, "In this country, it is customary to respond to a question with somehting called an 'answer.'" Dilbert says, "Your approach is more like what I would expect to see if clothing were used as bags for meat." Dilbert says, "Now I will ask my question a seventh time..." The Boss says, "Stop saying what you're thinking."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 17, 2008's comic on:


Tags #stepping down, #ceo, #money stolen, #hellhole, #huge bag of cash, #helicopter, #writes book, #buy book

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Dogbert says, "I am stepping down as CEO so I can spend more time with this money I stole from this hellhole." Dogbert says, "I need you and you to carry huge bags of cash to my helicopter." Wally says, "The worst part is that if he ever writes a book, I'll probably buy it."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 28, 2007's comic on:


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"Just because my head is an ashtray, that doesn't mean I can't be a good manager." "Ask me any question and I will show you my managerial talent." "The answer is six bags of potatoes!" "May I ask the question first?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 21, 2006's comic on:


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I got a stomach-ache during my vacation day so I'm changing it to a sick day. "Apparently there's a biological limit to how many potato chips I can eat in a 24-hour period." "And I'm taking tomorrow as a sick day too. I still have eight bags left."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 23, 2005's comic on:


Tags #evil director, #fly on plane, #guidelines, #key employees, #ceo, #presdient, #same flight, #interns, #run with sciccors, #plastic bags, #over heads

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Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources "I have new guidelines on who can fly on the same plane." "We can't risk losing too many key employees." "The CEO and the president are not allowed to be on the same flight." "No more than three vice presidents may be on the same flight." "What are the guidelines for interns?" "Infinite interns are allowed on the same flight. You are also allowed to run with scissors and put plastic bags over your heads." "How many interns are allowed per plastic bag?"