Being Smart Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

606 Results for Being Smart

View 1 - 10 results for being smart comic strips. Discover the best "Being Smart" comics from Dilbert.com.

Lifestyle Disagreer

Thank you for voting.
Lifestyle Disagreer - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 06, 2019's comic on:

Tags #argument, #conversation, #office workers, #sarcasm, #disagreement, #attitude

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: I hear what you're saying, and I disagree. Dilbert: Because...? Man: Because what? Dilbert: Do you have any reasons for your disagreement? Man: No, I'm a lifestyle disagreer. I disagree with everyone all the time. The reasons are irrelevant. Dilbert: You sound smart. Man: No. I'm not smart. Dilbert: And you're attractive too. Man: No. I'm ugl...okay, I see what you're doing.

Would It Look The Same

Thank you for voting.
Would It Look The Same - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 23, 2019's comic on:

Tags #boss, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #sarcasm, #dumb, #smart

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Hypothetically, how would you know if I were dumber than you or much smarter? Because in both cases I would make choices that you wouldn't understand. Wouldn't it look the same to you? Boss: I don't enjoy talking to you.

New Tv Ad

Thank you for voting.
New Tv Ad - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 22, 2019's comic on:

Tags #argument, #business ethics, #marketing, #men and women, #office workers, #relations between the sexes, #accuse

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Ben, from marketing, is here to give us a preview of our new tv ad. Ben: The opening scene shows a bunch of men who are weak and stupid, failing to solve a common problem. Then a confident and strong woman enters and solves the problem with ease. Dilbert: Isn't that incredibly sexist? Ben: No, because only the men are weak and stupid. Dilbert: And that's not sexist? Ben: Why are you being so weak and stupid? You sound like a bigot. Dilbert: I'll be quiet now. Wally: As quickly as it began, the rebellion was quashed.

Spelling Crypto Wrong

Thank you for voting.
Spelling Crypto Wrong - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 08, 2019's comic on:

Tags #argument, #boss, #frustrated, #learning, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #spelling, #words

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: You spelled "crypto" wrong. Boss: No, I didn't. Dilbert: You spelled it "c-r-i-p-t-o". Boss: So? Dilbert: There is no "I" in crypto. Boss: That's how I learned to spell it. Dilbert: You learned it wrong. No one else spells it that way. Boss: Now you're criticizing me for being an inovator? Dilbert: It's not innovation! It's a mistake! Why can't you admit you are wrong?! Boss: Why can't you?

Centralizing The Decentralized

Thank you for voting.
Centralizing The Decentralized - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 07, 2019's comic on:

Tags #boss, #business, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #sarcasm, #value

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I need to randomly change something so it seems as if being a manager is a real job. Maybe I should centralize all the functions I decentralized last year. Catbert: Or you could find a way to add value. Boss: I'm not magic.

Dilbert Characters

No One Is Taking Advice

Thank you for voting.
No One Is Taking Advice - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 30, 2019's comic on:

Tags #Advice, #confidence, #employees, #jobs, #office workers, #youth

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: I keep telling people how to do their jobs, but no one takes my advice. Wally: Maybe that's because you are so inexperienced that you don't realize how bad your advice is. That's ridiculous. How could I be so wrong and yet feel so confident? Wally: I miss being young.

Bad Analogy Guy Fits In

Thank you for voting.
Bad Analogy Guy Fits In - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 14, 2019's comic on:

Tags #employees, #insults, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Hi. I'm the bad analogy guy. I can't tell the difference between thinking and simply being reminded of unrelated things. Wally: You'll fit in well here. Man: You dress like a liar.

Toxic Employee Was Right

Thank you for voting.
Toxic Employee Was Right - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 02, 2019's comic on:

Tags #business, #employees, #fire, #managers & supervisors

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: does anyone have any suggestions for improving our company culture? dilbert: for starters, you could fire the toxic employee you hired for no good reason. boss whispers to toxic employee: you were right about dilbert being a hater. toxic employee: you should hear what he says about you.

Toxic Employee And Tina

Thank you for voting.
Toxic Employee And Tina - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 31, 2019's comic on:

Tags #business, #employees, #problem

View Transcript

Transcript

toxic employee: hi. i'm the new toxic employee. i sense you don't have enough problems, so i came to give you some. tina: ha! i'm too smart to fall for that. toxic employee: that's what i told dilbert, but he smirked.

Homeless Employees

Thank you for voting.
Homeless Employees - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 19, 2019's comic on:

Tags #concern, #cost, #employees, #homeless persons, #office workers, #pretend

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: We need to do something about our employees being homeless. Housing costs are too high around here. Boss: Maybe we could pay them more. Dogbert: I was thinking more along the lines of pretending to be concerned. Boss: I like where you're going with this.