Brilliant Advice Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

229 Results for Brilliant Advice

View 1 - 10 results for brilliant advice comic strips. Discover the best "Brilliant Advice" comics from Dilbert.com.

Try Hiding

Thank you for voting.
Try Hiding - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 24, 2019's comic on:


Tags #Advice, #boss, #compliment, #criticism, #ego, #employees, #managers & supervisors

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: If you compliment your employees, they will get big heads and think they are underpaid. But if you criticize them, they will be unhappy and quit. Boss: What should I do instead of those things? Dogbert: Have you tried hiding?

The Consultant

Thank you for voting.
The Consultant - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 12, 2019's comic on:


Tags #Advice, #boss, #business, #criticism, #managers & supervisors, #judgement

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: ...And that's what I recommend. Boss: I reject your recommendation because it doesn't match what we already decided to do. Man: That's no way to run a business. Boss: Can you refer me to a less judgy consultant?

No One Is Taking Advice

Thank you for voting.
No One Is Taking Advice - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 30, 2019's comic on:


Tags #Advice, #confidence, #employees, #jobs, #office workers, #youth

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: I keep telling people how to do their jobs, but no one takes my advice. Wally: Maybe that's because you are so inexperienced that you don't realize how bad your advice is. That's ridiculous. How could I be so wrong and yet feel so confident? Wally: I miss being young.

The Inexperienced Employee.

Thank you for voting.
The Inexperienced Employee. - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 29, 2019's comic on:


Tags #Advice, #criticism, #employees, #insults, #office workers

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Let me tell you how to do your job. You need to get all the vendors in the same room and insult them until they offer you discounts. Dilbert: That sounds super dumb. Man: That's what they said to Galileo old man.

Inexperienced Employee Advice

Thank you for voting.
Inexperienced Employee Advice - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 28, 2019's comic on:


Tags #criticism, #employees, #irritation, #office workers, #sarcasm, #experience, #arrogant

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Hi, I'm an inexperienced employee who tells experienced employees how to do their jobs. I compensate for my lack of experience with a thing called arrogance. Dilbert: That sounds worth-less. Man: Oh, yeah? Then why does every company have one of me?

Nervous About Presentation

Thank you for voting.
Nervous About Presentation - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 24, 2019's comic on:


Tags #Advice, #managers & supervisors, #nervous, #office workers, #presentation

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I'm nervous about the presentation I have to give to the board. Do you have any advice? Boss: Don't blow it, or else I'll fire you. Dilbert: I heard it's good to imagine the audience naked. Boss: Report yourself to H.R.

Wally Is New Pet Employee

Thank you for voting.
Wally Is New Pet Employee - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 19, 2019's comic on:


Tags #boss, #business ethics, #criticism, #employees, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #work ethic

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I"m looking for a new pet employee. The ideal candidate would be a brown-nosing tattler with no ethical core. Wally: That sounds like a brilliant idea, even though Dilbert says you are a moron. Boss: You got the job.

Wally Adopts An Elbonian Baby

Thank you for voting.
Wally Adopts An Elbonian Baby - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 05, 2019's comic on:


Tags #excuses, #office workers, #trick, #work, #adoption, #morality

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I've decided to adopt a kid from Elbonia so I'll have better excuses for missing work. Dilbert: Your plan is immoral, uncaring, and socially irresponsible. Wally: And brilliant. Dilbert: No one is saying it won't work.

Doctor Appointment

Thank you for voting.
Doctor Appointment - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 06, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #doctor, #office, #office workers, #medical advice, #essential oil, #attitude, #kava

View Transcript

Transcript

carol: i have a doctor's appointment today. the boss: doctor? bah! the boss: all you need are some essential oils and a supplement or two. carol: has anyone ever survived your medical advice? the boss: some kava could fix your attitude problem.

Links To Articles

Thank you for voting.
Links To Articles - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 26, 2019's comic on:


Tags #Advice, #internet, #Opinion, #research

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert the internet debate coach Dogbert: Always back up your opinion with links to articles. Asok: What if the only links I can find are from non-credible sources? Dogbert: I'll do some research. But I think that's the only kind there is.