Color Copies Cost Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

198 Results for Color Copies Cost

View 1 - 10 results for color copies cost comic strips. Discover the best "Color Copies Cost" comics from Dilbert.com.

Homeless Employees

Thank you for voting.
Homeless Employees - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 19, 2019's comic on:


Tags #concern, #cost, #employees, #homeless persons, #office workers, #pretend

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: We need to do something about our employees being homeless. Housing costs are too high around here. Boss: Maybe we could pay them more. Dogbert: I was thinking more along the lines of pretending to be concerned. Boss: I like where you're going with this.

Housing Costs

Thank you for voting.
Housing Costs - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 18, 2019's comic on:


Tags #cost, #discussion, #homeless persons, #house

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: Housing costs are so high that I had to move into a restroom stall. Man: I live in the park under a pile of wet cardboard. Asok: Have you tried a stall? Man: No, I'm too outdoorsy for that.

Asok Lives In The Office

Thank you for voting.
Asok Lives In The Office - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 17, 2019's comic on:


Tags #boss, #cost, #criticism, #house, #office, #office workers, #expectations

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: All of you should be more like Asok. He is in the office before I arrive and still here when I go home. Asok: That is because housing costs are so high that I live here in the office and sleep in a bathroom stall. Boss: That still leaves a lot of stalls for the rest of you.

Boss Needs Copies

Thank you for voting.
Boss Needs Copies - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 08, 2019's comic on:


Tags #boss, #frustrated, #irritation, #office, #office workers

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I need three copies of this. Carol: You just literally walked past the copier. Boss: Sheesh! Forget it! Just shred the stupid document. Carol: The shredder is right behind you.

Your Quote Is High

Thank you for voting.
Your Quote Is High - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 23, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #computer software, #office, #sales, #sales personnel, #quote

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: your quote is a bit high. can you do it cheaper? salesman: yes, we offer a low-cost option that involves me talking about the software, but you can't have it. dilbert: what would be the point of that? salesman: you're the one who brought it up.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 03, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #business ethics, #construction, #inventions, #nature, #technology, #trees

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I invented a cost-effective product to harvest CO2 from the air and turn it into construction material. Asok: So...you invented a tree? Dilbert: What? Asok: Trees take CO2 from the air and turn it into wood. Your invention will compete with plants and trees for necessary CO2. It seems you have doomed all life on Earth. Dilbert: Not if people act rationally and stop removing the CO2 when...wait... You're right. I doomed the planet. Boss: I'll be dead by then, so ship it.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 09, 2018's comic on:


Tags #communication, #frustrated, #office, #office workers, #talking

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Did Alice talk to you about the cost estimates? Ted: Mumble mumble. Dilbert: I can't hear you. Ted: Mumble mumble!!! Dilbert: Now you're just mumbling louder. Ted: Mumble mumble. Dilbert: Maybe you could turn toward me when you mumble and I can try to read your lips. Ted: Mumble mumble. Dilbert: I'm getting something about grapes, windshields, asthma, and blockchain. Ted: I didn't say any of those things. Dilbert: Okay. I understood that sentence. Now answer my question the same way. Ted: Mumble mumble.

Blockchain Versus Databases

Thank you for voting.
Blockchain Versus Databases  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 26, 2018's comic on:


Tags #boss, #computers, #office workers, #questions

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: And we can put the customer data on the blockchain. Alice: Why not use an immutable database instead? Dilbert: Which way should we go? Boss: Are either of them my favorite color?

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 11, 2018's comic on:


Tags #boss, #cost, #engineering, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #ladder, #waste

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Do you know where I can find a ladder? Dilbert: I can help you with that, but it will come at a big cost. It took me all morning to finally get "in the zone" to figure out this bug. Your interruption will set me back to square one and cost an entire day of productivity. Meanwhile, the rest of the team can't do their work because they are waiting for me to fix this bug first. So yes, I can help you find a ladder. But it will cost the company about $12,000 in lost productivity. I hope you have a good reason to need a ladder. Boss: I do. Ten minutes earlier. Boss: I wonder what ceiling tiles feel like.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 02, 2018's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #google, #data center, #software, #fix, #agile

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I put together a plan for our data center project. The Boss: We don't need a plan we're an agile company. It's better to move fast and fix our mistakes as we go. Dilbert: You're thinking of software. Where the cost of mistakes is low, this is a construction project. The Boss: That data center will be full of software, will it not? Dilbert: Yes, but... The Boss: Don't be afraid of change. Dilbert: What if I rapidly make a plan and tell you I didn't? Is that agile enough for you? The Boss: I'll need to google that.