Corner Comic Strips

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28 Results for Corner

View 1 - 10 results for corner comic strips. Discover the best "Corner" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #distraction, #exercise & fitness, #frustration, #lunch, #office workers, #time, #walking, #coworkers

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Dilbert: Would you like to take a long walk with me at lunch to get some exercise? Tina: That's a great idea! Dilbert: Okay, I'll come get you at noon. Ready? Tina: Yes, I only need ten minutes to finish this. Dilbert: I only have an hour for lunch, and your ten minutes will turn into twenty. Tina: That's okay because I wore heels today and I can't walk more than a block anyway. Dilbert: Why did you agree to take a long walk if you couldn't take a long walk? Tina: Because I was planning to walk to the store on the corner to do an errand anyway. Dilbert: You've ruined my walk! Tina: Just give me forty minutes to wrap this up.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #work ethic, #work best, #under pressure, #deadline, #corner stone

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Coworker: Wally, are you almost done with your part of the project? Wally: I work best under pressure, so I wait until the deadline is almost here. Coworker: What if something more important comes up and you don't have time? Wally: That's the cornerstone of my system.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #computer monitors, #two, #king, #queen, #evil grin, #cubicle

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Dilbert says, "In the land of cubicles, the man with two monitors is king." Dilbert says, "I pity my uni-monitored subjects, but I cannot respect them." Meanwhile, in another corner of the kingdom? Alice says, "The king is dead. Long live the queen."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #corner, #cubilce, #door, #fantasy, #nutrients, #office, #replacement, #giant mushroom

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The Boss: Now that you're out of the loop, your new cubicle will be a giant mushroom. It's a pleasant environment except when the mushroom gets its nutrients. wally: Nutrients?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #project stauts, #emails, #voicemails, #corner in hallway, #scampered away, #sinus stories

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dilbert: "The status of my project is that you ignored five of my e-mails and seven of my voice mails." "I tried to corner you in the hallway, but you filled all the air space with stories about your sinuses and scampered away." The boss: "Speaking of which, hoo boy." Wally: "I'd like to hear those stories."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office relocation, #studied boss, #learned methods, #corner you, #scream about bright light

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"I am in charge of the office relocation project, also known as O.R.P." "I have never managed anything, but I have studied our boss to learn his methods." "Let's see.. step one, I corner you. Step two, I talk until you scream about seeing a bright light."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #corner cubicle, #window control, #mad woman, #giant magnifiying glass, #life support

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Dilbert approaches Wally and says, "Alice moved into the corner cubicle and claimed control over the window shades!" Wally exclaims, "Gaaa!!" Dilbert says, "Our life support systems will be in the hands of a madwoman!" Wally is sweating and panicked. He says, "Maybe she'll be kind." Alice is holding on to a giant magnifying glass that she's attached to her cubicle wall."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #corner cubicle, #most pretigious, #entre row, #control window, #harness sun, #no screen glare

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Alice enters Dilbert's cubicle and says, "The corner cubicle opened up. I plan to make it mine." Alice chuckles and says continues, "That's right: I'll be sitting in the most prestigious cubicle in the entire row! Fear me!" Alice laughs harder and adds, "Buwaha! From there I will control the window shades and harness the sun!" Dilbert responds, "Please.. no screen glare."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #open door policy, #ruining happiness, #complain, #morale inspiring, #body language, #protective bubble, #stressed out scowl, #stop by, #insincere

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The Boss tells Catbert, "My open door policy is ruining my happiness." The Boss continues, "People stop by all day long and complain." The Boss asks, "How can I maintain the morale-inspiring illusion of an open door policy without actually having one?" Catbert responds, "Use your body language to create a protective bubble of unwelcomness." Catbert clenches his teeth and makes a hostile face. He says, "Try this stressed- out scowl." Dilbert asks Carol, "Can I poke my head in?" Carol responds, "Sure. He has an open door policy." Dilbert enters to find both The Boss and Catbert with stressed-out scowls. The Boss says, "It's a pleasure to see you." Catbert says, "We value your input." Dilbert runs away exclaiming, "Ay-yi-yi-yi!!" The Boss and Catbert poke their heads around the corner, still with stressed-out scowls. The Boss says, "Stop by any time."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #process meeting, #solve problem, #develop process, #generating ideas, #meeting, #cross - discilinary, #swat team, #offsite meeting, #meeting as firewall, #business

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Asok, The Boss, and Dilbert are sitting next to each other at a meeting. Asok raises his hand excitedly and says, "Ooh! Ooh! I know how to solve that problem!" The Boss replies, "Not so fast, Asok." Asok looks sullen as the Boss continues, "This isn't the solution meeting. This is the process meeting." The Boss continues, "Our goal is to develop a process for generating ideas to solve the problem." Wally turns to Asok and The Boss and says, "We don't know how to develop processes. Someone should have a meeting about that." Wally continues, "Someone like... a cross-disciplinary SWAT team in an offsite lockup meeting." The Boss says, "Hmm.. good idea." He then looks at Dilbert from the corner of his eye and finishes, "I guess this meeting is over." Wally continues to talk to Asok as they're walking out of the meeting. He says, "You see, Asok. You can only thwart a meeting by inventing other meetings to act as a firewall." The Boss approaches Asok at his desk and says, "Asok, I'm putting you on a cross-disciplinary SWAT team."