Search Results for "creativity"
Share February 10, 2018's comic on:
Share June 07, 2017's comic on:
Boss: Ted is complaining that you charged your expenses to his project. Dilbert: You told me to be creative because you forgot to fund my project. Boss: I wasn't expecting you to do that. Dilbert: That's what makes it creative. I looked it up.
Share June 06, 2017's comic on:
Dilbert: I couldn't do any work this week because you forgot to ask for funding for my project. Boss: Stop making excuses. Be creative. Ted: Why do you want to know my project charge code? Dilbert: Just curious.
Share August 30, 2015's comic on:
Boss: I want you to think like entrepreneurs. Dilbert: Should we take huge risks? Boss: No, the stockholders would hate that. Alice: Should we act as though we have no boss? Boss: NO. That would be chaos. Dilbert: Will we become billionaires if we succeed? Boss: Raises are capped at 3% this year. I'm just saying you should be more creative. Dilbert: and then we should act? Boss: No, that's when the problems happen.
Share June 28, 2015's comic on:
Wally: Do you mind if I take Steve Jobs' advice and practice meditation and mindfulness? Science says meditation can reduce stress and make me more productive. And obviously it worked for Steve Jobs, so there's that. To the untrained eye, it will seem as if I am napping. But in reality, I will be quieting my mind to boost creativity. Boss: Meditate on your own time. Wally: Wow. That just stressed me out and shut down my creative juices. Boss: Just do your job! Wally: Because quality doesn't matter?
Share September 27, 2014's comic on:
Dilbert: My best ideas are trapped in my head. Whenever I voice my ideas, I attract haters like zombies to fish sticks. Wally: IS that analogy one of your great ideas? Dilbert: I don't like the way you asked that.
Share December 24, 2013's comic on:
Boss: I traced all of our problems back to your lack of creativity. You should be creating ideas that change the course of civilization, but instead, you sit there like a lump. Dilbert: I'm sending you a link that describes fun ways to choke yourself.
Share November 21, 2013's comic on:
Boss: How's your creativity coming along? Dilbert: I don't have any. Your management style makes me focus all of my energy on staying out of trouble. Boss: Your insubordination is unacceptable! Dilbert: And there it is.
Share May 12, 2013's comic on:
Boss: I'm looking for an employee who is creative. Interviewee: That's me. I have ADHD and dylsexia. I'm also bipolar and schizophrenic. Dilbert: Checking the Internet... Well... that's surprising. Each of his conditions is highly correlated with creativity. Interviewee: Are you a normal? Boss: I... think so. Interviewee: Wow. I feel sorry for you. It must be hard going through life without any creativity. Boss: What's happening here? Dilbert: It might be some sort of creative thing.
Share September 25, 2012's comic on:
Boss: Experts say that doing mindless and repetitive tasks is a good way to spur creativity. That means you must be the most creative person in the office. Did you come up with any ideas? Carol: Yup. So far, I've come up with over seven hundred ways to dispose of your body.