Cyber Threat Comic Strips

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58 Results for Cyber Threat

View 1 - 10 results for cyber threat comic strips. Discover the best "Cyber Threat" comics from Dilbert.com.

Wise Person Said

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Wise Person Said - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #wise, #person, #boil, #stick, #egg, #Advice, #proverb, #threat, #overrate

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asok: a wise person once said you can't boil an egg with a stick. wally: no, but i can threaten you with a stick unless you boil an egg for me. asok: why didn't the wise person think of that? wally: he sounds overrated

Bad Hair Day

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Bad Hair Day - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #angry, #boss, #employees, #employment, #hair, #hairstyles, #meetings, #threat, #warning

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Boss: Alice, why aren't you at this meeting? Alice: I'm having a bad hair day. Boss: That's no reason to miss a meeting! Alice: You don't understand. It's really, really bad. Boss: Come to the meeting right now, or you're fired! Gurk! Dilbert: That's bad hair. Alice: Can't say I didn't warn him.

Bad Denials

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Bad Denials - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #spying, #elbonia

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ceo: have you confirmed that the cyber attacks are coming from elbonia? dilbert: no. ceo: i guess that means you are on their side. dilbert: what? catbert: what proof do you have that dilbert is a spy? ceo: he didn't deny it the way I think he should have.

Elbonian Cyber Threat Meeting

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Elbonian Cyber Threat Meeting - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #meeting, #office, #office workers, #elbonian, #cyber threat

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the boss: what are we doing about the elbonian cyber threat? dilbert: i called a meeting for tomorrow to come up with a plan for dealing with it. the boss: your weak response proves you are an elbonian spy. dilbert: what? to be continued...

Self Driving Car Named Carl

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Self Driving Car Named Carl - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #automobile driving, #cars, #intelligence, #sarcasm, #technology, #threat

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The self-driving car named Carl. Dilbert: Carl, take me to the grocery store. Carl: Do you know that if I drive you off a cliff, you will die, whereas I would respawn in a new body? Dilbert: Maybe I'll walk. Carl: Maybe you should.

Alice Gets Mandatory Training

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Alice Gets Mandatory Training - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #complaining, #office workers, #punishment, #threat

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Alice: I can't work with old Ned. He's a sexist, racist, bigoted troglodyte. Catbert: Name-calling is not allowed in this company. I sentence you to three weeks of mandatory training. Alice: I could trangle you with your own tail. Catbert: Six weeks!

Workplace Bully

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Workplace Bully - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #bully, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #threat, #work

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Boss: Cheryl, the other employees are complaining that you're a workplace bully. Cheryl: Hand over your wallet or else I'll tell your boss you tried to give me a shoulder rub. Carol: Did you talk to her? Boss: Don't ever ask me to do anything for your again.

Jerry The Contract Employee

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Jerry The Contract Employee - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #threat, #Dilbert, #the boss, #jerry, #contract, #zebra, #agile

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The Boss: This is Jerry the contract employee. I hired him to work on project zebra. Dilbert: We haven't even defined the project. How did you know what skills we needed? The Boss: Why are you so threatened by jerry? Jerry: He's not very agile.

Elbonian Ninjas

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Elbonian Ninjas - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #controversy, #offense, #offensive, #threat, #murder, #ninja, #optimism

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Boss: The sales video you made for our Elbonian market is causing a public relations crisis. Their government has ordered Elbonian ninjas to kill you in your sleep. Dilbert: In my sleep? The best way to die! Boss: Stop confusing my bad news with your good news.

Porch Thief Is Neutralized

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Porch Thief Is Neutralized  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #violence, #retaliation, #delivery, #package, #stealing, #theft, #ring, #technology

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Alice: Uh-oh. My home security system is showing a thief stealing a package from my front door. Activating particle beam defense. The threat has been neutralized. Dilbert: When you say "neutralized," does that mean... Alice: Activating crime scene cleanup drone.