Deciosn Comic Strips
13 Results for Deciosn
View 1 - 10 results for deciosn comic strips. Discover the best "Deciosn" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share September 21, 2012's comic on:
The Boss: Carl choked the pooch on the platform decision. I need you to throw him under the bus. Asok: He sounds like a very bad person, I will take care of that right away. I just found a website that kits regional idioms. Ive done some bad, bed things.
Share October 13, 2011's comic on:
Dilbert: Okay, this next decision involves six variables, four imbeciles, and one brilliant engineer. According to the Dogbert complexity algorithm, it is impossible to make a rational decision in this situation. All in favor of giving up? Boss: I found out I'm a brilliant engineer.
Share February 06, 2011's comic on:
The Boss: Dilbert, work with Gustav to get our new product explained on our website. Gustav: Heres what I have so far. Dilbert: Its awful. Gustav: excuse me? Dilbert: there no information. Its all images and annoying music. Dilbert: People make buying decisions based on what they read. This gives them nothing, Gustav: If I clutter the design with useful information, it will look ugly ad I won't be able to use it in my portfolio. I need that portfolio to get a job at a better company, Please help me escape. Gustav: You'll probably work here until you die in your cubicle no matter what the website looks like. The Boss: Did you help Gustav? Dilbert: yes, But it wasn't a good day for our stock holders.
Share August 15, 2008's comic on:
The Boss says, "I never have enough information to make an informed decision." The Boss says, "But that's okay because I'm a good judge of people." Dilbert says, "Can you approve this?" The Boss thinks, "Baby puncher."
Share May 01, 2005's comic on:
I've received some complaints that you've been badgering the managers. "Hmm...badgering you say." "Let me see if I understdnd this "badgering" concept." "Let's say that I need a manager's decision on a critical issue..." "And the manager in question ignores my e-mails and phone calls..." "shouldn't I insist that this manager do the job for which he is overpaid?!!!" "Huh? Shouldn't I? What do you say? Huh? Huh? How about it? Huh?" "I'll say I talked to her."
Share November 12, 2004's comic on:
"You can't resist the shard-filled ultra-doughnuts even though you know the hazards." "Mmph" "Free will is an illusion. People always choose the perceived path of greatest pleasure." "Now, rationalize your decision, you mindless pink robot!" "I'm only having one."
Share June 04, 2004's comic on:
"Uh-oh, someone wants me to make a decision." "I summon the dark demon of ineffective management to smite the person who wants this decision!!!" "Maybe I could help you make the decision." "I requested smiting."
Share June 05, 2003's comic on:
Headline: Catbert: Evil H.R. Director. Catbert is sitting behind his desk, an employee is standing before him. Catbert says, "I'm reminding everyone that layoffs can improve morale." Catbert continues, "Layoffs prove that management is capable of making tough decisions to turn things around!" The employee responds, "You're right! I do feel more optimistic now!" Catbert adds, "Secondly, you're fired."
Share December 21, 1999's comic on:
Share July 29, 1999's comic on:
Caption: "Juan Delegator" The Boss carries a large pile of paper. Juan hands him another piece and says, "..And this also requires your decision before I can work on it." Juan says, "Do you have any more assignments for me that I can turn into work for you?" The boss says, "No." Juan says, "And have you learned your lesson?" The boss says, "Yes: Give all work to Alice."