Disciplinary Action Forms Comic Strips

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75 Results for Disciplinary Action Forms

View 1 - 10 results for disciplinary action forms comic strips. Discover the best "Disciplinary Action Forms" comics from Dilbert.com.

Five Pages Of Forms

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Five Pages Of Forms   - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #salesman, #vendor, #application, #technology, #cancel, #order, #easy, #difficult, #signature

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vendor salesman: just fill out these five pages of information, and we're good to go. dilbert: no. cancel the order, and i'll find an easier vendor to work with. vendor salesman: in that case, all i need is your signature. dilbert: that worked? continued...

Bias For Action

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Bias For Action - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm, #co-workers, #business, #meeting, #prototype, #bias

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Co-workers around meeting table. Ted: our pointy-haired boss told us to scrap our prototype and start over from scratch. dilbert: o was in that meeting and he said nothing like that. maybe we should verify what he wants. ted: or... we could have a bias for action!

New Forms

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New Forms - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #money, #office, #office workers, #efficiency

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Dilbert: Did you approve my budget request? Boss: No, you used the old form. Dilbert: Do we have new forms? Boss: In hindsight, we should have funded the creation of new budget request forms before we made the old ones obsolete.

Bias For Action

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Bias For Action - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #the boss, #Dilbert, #waste, #time, #thought, #chairs, #meeting

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The Boss: We need to have a bias for action! Alice: Good idea. This meeting is a total waste of time. The Boss: I probably should have thought that through.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bureaucracy, #paperwork, #form, #request, #convoluted

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Dilbert: I need a capital allocation form. Man: Do you have a form to request that form? Dilbert; I need a form to get a form? Man: That's how we keep track of the forms. Dilbert: Okay, give me a form to request a form. Man: Those are online. Dilbert: Where online? Man: I don't know. I only do paper forms. Dilbert: Who can I ask? Man: Don't drag me into this. Dilbert: I demand to talk to your boss. Man: I hope you brought a boss request form.

Bias For Action

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Bias For Action - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #action, #attention, #confusion, #listening, #strategy

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Boss: We need a bias for action. Dilbert: Does listening count? Boss: That's not action. Dilbert: So... you don't want me to listen to you? Boss: I didn't think this all the way through. Dilbert: Tap me on the shoulder when you're done.

Dilbert Forms Snap Judgement

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Dilbert Forms Snap Judgement - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #judgment, #judging, #first impression, #meeting people

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Tim: Hi, I'm Tim. Dilbert: That's enough. I formed a snap judgement. Studies say we form snap judgments about people.And I already did, so no need for details. Tim: I'm just looking for my phone. Dilbert: Yup, I already judged you to be flakey.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #frustration, #managers & supervisors, #product changes, #change orders, #new features, #online change order system, #old forms, #change order, #managemet, #better plan, #business

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Boss; Don't make any product changes without change orders. When users ask for new features, direct them to the online change order system. Dilbert: That system only has the old forms. Boss: Tell someone to put the new ones on there. Wally: That would require a change order. Dilbert: Maybe we could tell users our sense of hope was killed by something called management. The we could sort of slump over like we're waiting for death's cold embrace. Boss: I'll get back to you if I think of a better plan.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #frustration, #bias for action, #enemy of good, #folksy, #spray defective stuff

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CEO: We need to have a bias for action. Don't let perfect be the enemy of good. Dilbert: So... a carpenter should saw the board first and measure it later? CEO: Your use of that folksy saying makes my strategy sound dumb. Alice: Why do you care if your strategy is perfect or not? Dilbert: You just said it's more important to spray your defective stuff on the universe than it is to get things right. CEO: "Spray my defective stuff?" Dilbert: Should I have waited for a perfect way to say that?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #executives, #how-to, #book on leadership, #steve jobs, #warren buffet, #gandhi, #ryan seacrest, #carbon based life forms

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CEO: I'm reading a book about what it takes to be a great leader. Do you know what Steve Jobs, Warren Buffett, Gandhi, and Ryan Seacrest have in common? Dilbert: None of them read this book. CEO: And they are carbon-based life-forms.