Employees Unhappy Comic Strips
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579 Results for Employees Unhappy
View 1 - 10 results for employees unhappy comic strips. Discover the best "Employees Unhappy" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday February 20,
2021
Tricking Employees
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Friday October 02,
2020
Robots Will Sneak Up On Us
Tags #argue, #business, #employees, #enginners, #managers & supervisors, #replace, #robots, #technology, #train
Transcript
boss: we aren't yet ready to replace engineers with robots, but that day will sneak up on us. so i'd like all of you to train a robot to do your jobs, just so we are ready. dilbert: you want us to train our own replacements? boss thinking: this is another thing a robot would not argue about.
Tuesday September 29,
2020
Critics Not Intelligent
Tags #intelligence, #office workers, #employees, #smart, #critics, #agreement, #face mask
Transcript
alice: i've noticed that none of my critics are intelligent. smart people always seem to agree with me. dilbert: what makes you think they are smart? alice: because they agree with me. i have to give you a maskless "duh" for that. alice pulls off face mask: duh!
Monday September 07,
2020
Reasonable Doubt
Tags #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #employees, #health, #leader, #coronavirus, #indoor, #face mask, #kill, #doubt, #sarcasm
Transcript
Carol: that stupid coronavirus is no match for a healthy, young leader such as yourself. freedom demands that you go to crowded indoor places without wearing your mask. boss: are you trying to kill me? carol: i'd say there's reasonable doubt.
Monday August 31,
2020
No More Id Badges
Tags #managers & supervisors, #business, #employment, #i.d. badge, #employees, #freedom, #tattoo, #sarcasm, #face mask
Transcript
boss: the company is considering no longer requiring employees to wear i.d. badges. asok yelling: yes! freedom! dilbert: too too. hold... hold... boss: ...in favor of permanent forehead tattoos. dilbert: always wait for the second part.
Wednesday August 26,
2020
Narcisism Makes You Happy
Tags #office workers, #sarcasm, #narcissim, #happy, #unhappy, #therapist, #reason, #face mask, #wrong
Transcript
Carol: you should see a therapist about your narcissism. dilbert: if i'm happy and you're unhappy, doesn't that mean you should see a therapist and i should stay the way i am? carol: no, that's totally wrong, but give me a minute to come up with a reason.
Wednesday July 22,
2020
No Talk About Morale
Tags #business, #employees, #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm, #morale, #talk, #engagement, #workplace, #culture, #happy, #question, #covid, #pandemic
Transcript
dilbert and boss wearing face masks. dilbert: i've noticed that we used to talk about employee morale... but now we talk about "engagement" and "workplace culture." why is that? boss: we found out it doesn't matter if you are happy. dilbert: remind me to never ask another question.
Wednesday July 15,
2020
Boss Fired For Being White Supremacist
Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #racism, #fired, #employees, #white supremacist, #apathy, #career, #punch, #witness, #denial
Transcript
ceo: i have to fire you because employees are saying you are a white supremacist. boss: but i'm not. ceo: doesn't matter. i care more about my career than your life. boss: you're firing me just to look good? ceo: and i'll need to punch you in front of witnesses.
Friday June 19,
2020
Dilbert Doesn't Believe In Safety
Tags #employees, #office workers, #safety, #sarcasm, #team
Transcript
Tina: Ugh, Dilbert is on the project team? That guy doesn't believe in safety. Man: Just out of curiosity, what evidence of that extremely weird allegation have you seen? Tina: What evidence do you have that you exist? See? Anyone can do that.
Saturday June 06,
2020
Confident Wrong Guy
Tags #boss, #confidence, #employees, #insults, #obliviousness, #office workers, #sarcasm, #hire
Transcript
Boss: I hired a guy who is always wrong, yet he is inexplicably confident. Alice: Why? We already have one of you. Boss: I don't know what you meant by that. But I am confident it is wrong.