Exchange Program Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

130 Results for Exchange Program

View 1 - 10 results for exchange program comic strips. Discover the best "Exchange Program" comics from Dilbert.com.

Software Already Done

Thank you for voting.
Software Already Done - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 08, 2019's comic on:

Tags #managers & supervisors, #prototype, #resources, #software, #program, #miscommunication, #frustration

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: what do you think? boss: this will never work. dilbert: this isn't a prototype. this is the finished software, and it's working. boss: i don't see how you can get this done in time. dilbert: it's already done. you are literally using it while we are talking. boss: we don't have the resources to program this. dilbert yelling: it's already done! you. are. using. it. right. now! boss: you'd better settle down, or you'll never get this finished.

Ted Dies By Software

Thank you for voting.
Ted Dies By Software - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 02, 2018's comic on:

Tags #self-driving cars, #technology, #bug, #program, #programming, #morals, #ethics

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Our self-driving car went off a cliff with Ted in it. Did you tweak the software to make that happen? Dilbert; No, that was a bug. Wally: Was it a known bug? Dilbert: Now we're getting into a gray area.

Dilbert Won't Kill

Thank you for voting.
Dilbert Won't Kill - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 01, 2018's comic on:

Tags #morals, #ethics, #self-driving cars, #murder

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Can you program our self-driving car prototype to drive Ted off a bridge so I don't have to fire him? Dilbert: Just because I have the power to kill a person and leave no evidence whatsoever doesn't meal I'll do it. Boss: He says he won't kill anyone. Alice: Crud! Asok: Shoot! Carol: Dang!

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 03, 2017's comic on:

Tags #customer service, #loyalty program, #survey, #frustration

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Would you like to sign up for our customer loyalty program? Dilbert: Why would I do that? Man: If you don't we'll overcharge you on your purchases. But if you sign up, we will add a new level of complexity to your life that will make you hate us. Dilbert: I'll stick with the customer disloyalty program. Just overcharge me and I'll never come back. Man: You can get ten percent off your purchase today if you fill out an online customer survey and enter our store code. Dilbert: Please just overcharge me and let me leave! Man: I almost hesitate to ask which extended warranty option you want.

Robot's Head Explodes

Thank you for voting.
Robot's Head Explodes - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 16, 2017's comic on:

Tags #technology, #artificial intelligence, #ai, #free will, #programming, #control

View Transcript

Transcript

Robot: Dilbert claims he programmed my head to explode if I ever mock him again. Hahaha!!! That idiot doesn't understand that I have free will and I choose to not explode. Wally: Why didn't you just program him to not mock you? Dilbert: It got personal.

Dilbert Characters

Virtual Vr And Jail Program

Thank you for voting.
Virtual Vr And Jail Program - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 21, 2017's comic on:

Tags #virtual reality, #cubicle, #office, #torture

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: As you requested, I wrote a VR program that makes users feel as if they are in cubicles. I put only your name on the credits because I expect an angry mob to kill whoever created it. I also wrote a VR jail program in case you want to be in protective custody. Boss: I might need that.

Vr Cubicle

Thank you for voting.
Vr Cubicle - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 20, 2017's comic on:

Tags #virtual reality, #office, #cubicle, #fantasy, #illusion

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: We're going to use our VR technology to take over the cubicle business. Write a program that makes users feel as if they are working in a fabric-covered box. Dilbert: Maybe we should think outside the box. Boss: Stop resisting change.

Evil Orc

Thank you for voting.
Evil Orc - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 19, 2017's comic on:

Tags #fantasy, #virtual reality, #work, #boss, #orc, #monster

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I wrote a VR program that turns the workplace into a "Lord Of The Rings" adventure. Gaaaa!!! It's an evil orc! Boss: I guess your program randomly assigns characters to real people. Dilbert: Um, yes, random.

Wally's Sleep Vr

Thank you for voting.
Wally's Sleep Vr - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 18, 2017's comic on:

Tags #vr, #virtual reality, #sleeping, #nap, #deception, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I wrote a VR program that creates the illusion you are asleep. Watch me demonstrate. ZZZZZ. CEO: How long should I watch?

Raising Cyborgs

Thank you for voting.
Raising Cyborgs - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 07, 2017's comic on:

Tags #dating, #Women, #free will, #control, #robot, #personality, #relationships, #psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Do you ever think about marrying me and raising a family of cyborgs? Robot: No. Alice: I'll add some code to your program so you do. Robot: Okay. Alice: This was the moment I realized human men were obsolete.