First Step Comic Strips
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572 Results for First Step
View 1 - 10 results for first step comic strips. Discover the best "First Step" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday January 28,
2021
Ted The First Gay And Disabled Person
Thursday October 22,
2020
First Astronaut
Tags #astronaut, #business, #coffee, #division, #face mask, #honor, #question, #safety, #space, #technology, #test, #mars
Transcript
carol: our space division asked if you would accept the honor of being their first astronaut to mars. boss: i didn't know they had even tested it for safety yet. carol: he asked too many questions.
Saturday September 12,
2020
Augmented Reality
Tags #office workers, #business, #introduction, #reality, #glasses, #social media, #history, #impressions, #dumb, #face mask
Transcript
girl: my name is ... dilbert: stop right there. my augmented reality glasses are showing me your entire social media history. girl: i hope it makes a good first impression. dilbert yelling: my god, you are dumb!
Saturday September 05,
2020
Lifetime Of Being Wrong
Tags #business, #office workers, #wrong, #decision, #career, #assess, #life, #sarcasm, #face mask
Transcript
dilbert: i think you're wrong. co-worker: what error did i make? dilbert: i'm basing my decision on your entire career of being wrong about everything. i hope i'm not the first person to point that out. co-worker: give a minute to reassess my entire life.
Sunday August 23,
2020
Ratio Is Too High
Tags #managers & supervisors, #expense, #budget, #capital, #ratio, #too high, #afford, #standards, #historical, #irrelevant, #manage, #department
Transcript
boss: we need to reduce our expense budget to 40% of our capital budget. dilbert: why do we need to do that? boss: because the ratio is too high. dilbert: are you saying we can't afford it? boss: no. i'm saying the ratio is too high. dilbert: okay, but by what standard is it "too high"? boss: by historical standards, it has never been this high. dilbert: i don't think we want to start using an irrelevant ratio to manage the department. boss: to be fair, this is just the first time you noticed.
Thursday August 20,
2020
Study 5 G First
Tags #managers & supervisors, #technology, #business, #5g, #dangerous, #study, #research, #reporter
Transcript
boss: dilbert, i need you to respond to this reporter who thinks our 5g technology is dangerous. dilbert: is it dangerous? boss: how would i know? dilbert: maybe i should study it first. boss: never mind. i'll ask someone else.
Saturday July 11,
2020
First Time For Everything
Tags #amazing, #business, #business plan, #concept, #first time, #good, #managers & supervisors, #new, #pandemic, #face mask, #covid
Transcript
boss and wally wearing face masks. boss: why should we do what you are suggesting when literally no one has ever tried it before? wally: because everything good and amazing had to be done by someone for the first time. boss: will this be good and amazing? wally: let's keep this on the concept level.
Saturday July 04,
2020
Lack Of Social Contact
Tags #office workers, #pandemic, #technology, #social, #contact, #best, #week, #covid, #cope
Transcript
Wally and Dilbert at coffee pot wearing face masks. dilbert: how did you cope with the loss of social contact during the pandemic? wally: best weeks of my life. how about you? dilbert: i didn't want to be the first to say it.
Friday July 03,
2020
Quarantine Before Date
Tags #date, #desperation, #dinner, #office workers, #quarantine, #technology, #two weeks
Transcript
dilbert: would you like to go to dinner with me? women: only if you self-quarantine for two weeks first. dilbert: can do! women: well, it seems i underestimated your desperation.
Sunday January 26,
2020
Buzzflawed Interview
Tags #managment, #business, #reporter, #cheat, #suppliers, #question
Transcript
carol: a reporter for buzz flawed wants to interview you. boss: i don't see any downside to that! reporter: my first question is, do you still cheat all of your suppliers? boss: no! of course not. reporter: so. you're admitting you cheated your suppliers in the past? boss: get out of my office, you evil monster! reporter: okay, i got what i needed. one week later: voice from boss's smartphone: "the pudgy miscreant could not hide his glee when bragging about cheating his suppliers."