Grew Up Comic Strips
11 Results for Grew Up
View 1 - 10 results for grew up comic strips. Discover the best "Grew Up" comics from Dilbert.com.
Boss: Wally, do you have a minute? Wally: No. I have to get a haircut. Boss: You can't get a haircut on company time. Wally: I'm only cutting the hairs that grew on company time. Boss: How do you know which ones grew on company time? Wally: It's always hairs three and five.
Dilbert: My CPR instructor says I was one of his best students. Topper: That's nothing. I'm so good at CPR that my practice dummy came to life. He grew limbs and got married to a crash test dummy. They had three mannequins together and they live in the suburbs. But the marriage didn't last because the CPR dummy could not forget the taste of my lips. I blame myself for being irresistible. Why do all of my conversations end with me sitting alone?
Tablet: Scientists grew a human ear on the back of a rat. When asked for a comment, the rat said, "Hey, get this ear off my back. I didn't agree to this." The lead scientist on the project said, "Great. Now you made it all weird."
Boss: Our CEO ordered me to fire you for embarrassing him at a meeting But that would be inconvenient for me. So... I'm going to call you Carlos from now on. And it would help if you grew a beard and walked with a limp.
Asok: Hi-ho, marketing people! I've been transferred into your department until mky brain heals. I drank some industrial sludge. But don't worry - I'll be able to shake it off in a few days. A little pollution can't hurt me. I grew up in India. This brain worm will be dead in a week, tops.
"I decided to shave off the beard I grew when I was waiting for my boss to get off the phone." "Beard? I hadn't noticed." "This will take awhile, so I'll wait until time slows to a crawl and do it then." "Did I ever tell you about my first job as an envelope licker?" "Click"
Dilbert: "I grew a beard while waiting for my boss to get off the phone." "Then I realized I don't need to exercise because no one expects bearded guys to have any discipline." "I'll have everything on the even-numbered pages, a cigar and ...Do you sell suspenders?"
The Boss is sitting at his desk. The phone rings. The Boss thinks, "Ringy thingy." The Boss picks up the phone. The voice at the other end says, "While you were working, your children grew up and moved away." After the phone call, The Boss sits and thinks, "I've never had a plan that worked so well."
Wally and Dilbert are at the coffee machine. Wally says, "I heard you had a cold." Dilbert responds, "It wasn't a cold." Dilbert continues, "I was addicted to prescription drugs and I grew an exoskeleton. I've been in rehab and surgery for six months." Wally responds, "Just to be clear: Can I catch any of that by touching the coffeemaker after you?"
Caption: "Tina the tech writer." Tina holds a paper under her arm. Tina stands at The Bosses desk and says, "I grew tired of writing the same old stories for the newsletter." The Boss reads paper. Tina says, 'So I started inventing stories of bizarre work-place crimes." The Boss reads and looks surprised. Tina says, "Sometimes we in the media have to give the copycat criminals a little kick start."