Guilt Comic Strips
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43 Results for Guilt
View 1 - 10 results for guilt comic strips. Discover the best "Guilt" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday December 03,
2022
Survivor's Guilt
Monday September 14,
2020
Survivor Guilt
Tags coronavirus, managers & supervisors, business, double, income, pandemic, covid, survivor guilt, sympathy, face mask
Transcript
ceo: well, i personally doubled my income during the pandemic. now i have a bad case of survivor guilt. dilbert: do you expect to get much sympathy for that? ceo: i won't know until i try.
Friday February 01,
2019
Ten Year Financial Projections
Monday December 10,
2018
Carol Raises Money For School
Tags family & parenting, guilt, office, office workers, sales, sarcasm, school
Transcript
Carol: I'm selling chocolate bars to raise funds for my kid's school. Dilbert: I'm childless, so I already subsidize your kid's education. Carol: I was hoping it would feel too awkward for you to say no. Dilbert: By my calculations, you owe me money.
Sunday November 04,
2018
Tags Advice, business, criticism, employment, managers & supervisors, office workers
Transcript
Asok: I'm thinking of getting a degree in business and moving onto the management track. Is it fun being a boss? Boss: It's the best! I haven't done anything hard since the day I got this job. I mostly just criticize idiots all day long. It's as if the company is paying me to do my hobby. Speaking of pay, my salary is about triple your pay. Asok: Is there any downside? Boss: I had a lot of guilt at first. Asok: It must have been awful. Boss: Yes, it was the longest ten minutes of my life.
Thursday August 02,
2018
Coffee Machine Uses Guilt
Tags Wally, alice, Dilbert, coffee, coffee maker, automatic, invention, manipulation
Transcript
Dilbert: I added artificial intelligence to our coffee maker. Now it uses guilt to manipulate people into making a fresh pot if they take the last cup. Coffee Maker: You disgust me. Wally: I get that a lot.
Saturday April 28,
2018
Aggressive Littering
Tags guilt, plea, charges, littering, murder, rich people, discrimination
Transcript
Dilbert: I thought you were going to jail for murdering the clients of your cryogenic investment firm. Dogbert: I argued that my clients were already dead. The judge reduced the charge to "aggressive littering." Dilbert: You kicked two-hundred unfrozen brains into the river. Dogbert: You sound just like that angry prosecutor.
Thursday April 26,
2018
Kicking Brains Into The River
Tags surveillance, photo, evidence, identity, guilt, proof
Transcript
Police Officer: You're under arrest for running a scam cryogenic investment firm. We have video footage of you kicking unfrozen brains into the river. Dogbert: That doesn't look like me. Police Officer: You were chanting your own name.
Saturday April 14,
2018
No Path To Success
Tags proof, guilt, exoneration, accusation, negative
Transcript
Dilbert: I emailed you proof that you were wrong when you accused me of deleting Alice's project files. Boss: Now I hate you for always needing to be right. Dilbert: I don't see a path to success here. Boss: Your negativity is like a cancer in the workplace.
Friday April 13,
2018
Exactly What Guilty People Say
Tags conspiracy, accusation, guilt, innocence, logic, rumor
Transcript
Narrator: How conspiracy theories happen... Carol: Alice says you deleted her files on the server. Dilbert: That didn't happen. She's nuts. Carol: Ha! You wouldn't be so angry if it weren't true. Dilbert: What? That doesn't even make sense. Carol: That's exactly what guilty people say. Narrator: Continued...

