Hair Quiver Comic Strips
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178 Results for Hair Quiver
View 1 - 10 results for hair quiver comic strips. Discover the best "Hair Quiver" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday July 28,
2019
Bad Hair Day
Tags #angry, #boss, #employees, #employment, #hair, #hairstyles, #meetings, #threat, #warning
Transcript
Boss: Alice, why aren't you at this meeting? Alice: I'm having a bad hair day. Boss: That's no reason to miss a meeting! Alice: You don't understand. It's really, really bad. Boss: Come to the meeting right now, or you're fired! Gurk! Dilbert: That's bad hair. Alice: Can't say I didn't warn him.
Monday April 08,
2019
Offensive Product Name
Tags #business, #insults, #office, #office workers, #elbonian
Transcript
dilbert: our product name turns out to be offensive in the elbonian language. dilbert: it means "one who rips off his own facial hair and feeds it to a baby bird, which chokes and dies, signaling years of drought." the boss: that's all in one word? dilbert: they only have seventeen words, and nine of them are insults.
Saturday July 28,
2018
Haircut On Company Times
Tags #hair, #haircut, #time, #break
Transcript
Boss: Wally, do you have a minute? Wally: No. I have to get a haircut. Boss: You can't get a haircut on company time. Wally: I'm only cutting the hairs that grew on company time. Boss: How do you know which ones grew on company time? Wally: It's always hairs three and five.
Friday March 09,
2018
Boss Loves Criticism
Tags #mentor, #mentee, #protege, #Advice, #competition, #deception
Transcript
Alice The Mentor. Alice: One thing I can tell you about our boss is that he loves constructive criticism. Man: I feel as if your advice is intended to make me fail because you see me as a threat to take your job. Alice: And he loves it when you grab him by the hair and yell, "handles!"
Thursday October 05,
2017
Pictures Lie
Tags #photos, #truth, #lying, #deceit, #photoshop, #public relations, #pr, #appearances
Transcript
CEO: The public doesn't believe I really helped serve food at the homeless shelter. Dogbert: Tell them pictures don't lie. CEO: Pictures lie all the time. In fact, that's the best way to lie. Dogbert: Keep that insight to yourself. CEO: I have a full head of hair on Tinder.
Monday January 30,
2017
Robotic Hair Transplant
Tags #coffee, #conversation, #hair, #surgery, #medical
Transcript
Never go to a robotic hair transplant center on the same day they upgrade the software. Is that the surgery where they take hair from the back of your head and fill in the bald spot? That's how the old software worked. The new one didn't respect boundaries.
Tuesday November 15,
2016
Humidity Is Wrecking Hair
Tags #hair, #humid, #bad hair day
Transcript
Alice: The humidity is wrecking my hair. Please don't stare. Dilbert: I can't promise that. Alice: You're staring! Dilbert: I'm afraid to turn my back on it.
Monday May 09,
2016
Loud Howard And Tina Have A Romance
Tags #romance, #relationships, #dating, #secret, #speaking, #loud, #shouting
Transcript
Loud Howard. Tina: We must keep our office romance a secret. Howard: I won't tell anyone about us, Tina!!!! Dilbert: You have a bad case of Loud Howard hair. But what does the extra spittle mean? Hmmm... Tina: Grrrr...
Monday September 21,
2015
Hairdresser Illuminati
Tags #hair, #haircut, #hairstyles, #success, #Politics, #candidates, #secret organization, #secret society, #control
Transcript
The Hairdresser Illuminati. Dogbert: Before we start, I'll need to see a list of your political views. Hoo-boy, this is some crazy stuff. I have just the right hairstyle for this. There. That should keep you out of The White House.
Saturday September 19,
2015
Haircut Illuminati
Tags #secret society, #organizations, #illuminati, #hair, #hairstyles, #haircut, #barber, #Politics, #politicians, #success
Transcript
Dogbert: I became a member of the Hairdresser Illuminati. Dilbert: The what? Dogbert: It's a shadowy organization that controls the world by manipulating the hairstyles of political candidates. Boss: What is my barber doing here? Dogbert: That haircut will never become your next president.