Justify Funding Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

58 Results for Justify Funding

View 1 - 10 results for justify funding comic strips. Discover the best "Justify Funding" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 15, 2018's comic on:


Tags #suggestion, #invention, #budget, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: The electronic suggestion box project is halfway done. The original design called for a bos that scans and digitizes suggestions written on paper and emails them to the appropriate manager. Then the device shreds the original paper suggestion to make room for more. I already built the box and the shredder. I'll need additional funding to finish the scanning part. Boss: We don't have any flexibility in our budget. Let's just deploy what you have. Dilbert: All I have is a box that shreds suggestions before anyone reads them. Boss: Don't let perfect be the enemy of good.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 19, 2017's comic on:


Tags #condescention, #disagreement, #criticism, #snark, #body language, #argument

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Are there any questions? Man: Your plan is so dumb that I am forced to make my condescending face to respond. You are so dumb! Dilbert: Did you have a reason? Man: Do I have a reason? Hahaha! That's precious. There are so many reasons that I don't know where to start! Dilbert: Just pick one. Man: Haha! Easy. You will never get funded. Dilbert: It's already fully funded. What else do you have? Man: To be honest, all I had was the funding issues and this face.

Dilbert Tries To Get Funding

Thank you for voting.
Dilbert Tries To Get Funding - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 10, 2017's comic on:


Tags #budget, #money, #spending, #projects, #upgrades, #technology, #software, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Who are you? Dilbert: I'm an engineer on an unfunded project. I'm attending random meetings to see if I can shake loose some spare budget money. Man: We'll be talking about the mandatory software upgrade. Dilbert: Sounds like a huge waste of money.

Ted Complains About Dilbert

Thank you for voting.
Ted Complains About Dilbert  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 07, 2017's comic on:


Tags #budget, #money, #funding, #creativity, #embezzlement, #fraud

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Ted is complaining that you charged your expenses to his project. Dilbert: You told me to be creative because you forgot to fund my project. Boss: I wasn't expecting you to do that. Dilbert: That's what makes it creative. I looked it up.

Be Creative With Funding

Thank you for voting.
Be Creative With Funding  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 06, 2017's comic on:


Tags #budget, #creativity, #funding, #money, #progress, #trick

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I couldn't do any work this week because you forgot to ask for funding for my project. Boss: Stop making excuses. Be creative. Ted: Why do you want to know my project charge code? Dilbert: Just curious.

Dilbert Loses His Budget

Thank you for voting.
Dilbert Loses His Budget - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 17, 2017's comic on:


Tags #vacation, #decision, #funding, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You were on vacation last week so I made decisions about your project without you. Dilbert: Oh no... what have you done? Boss: I transferred your budget to another project. Dilbert: I need that money! Boss: Oh. Can you wait until the other project manager goes on vacation?

Tall People And Men

Thank you for voting.
Tall People And Men - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 05, 2015's comic on:


Tags #discrimination, #frustration, #money, #retribution, #revenge, #salary, #sexism, #wages, #Women

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: How can you justify paying me less than tall people and men!!! CEO: Duh. The reason is that you are not as tall and you don't have male body parts. Alice: Can I borrow your scissors?

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 22, 2014's comic on:


Tags #deception, #investor, #investors, #pick up lines, #start up idea, #funding, #saturday night drinks, #date

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: An angel investor agreed to meet with me about my start-up idea. Dilbert: You need to be careful because he might be... Alice: We're meeting for drinks at his house on Saturday night. Dilbert: I'm socially inept and even I know that sounds wrong. Alice: He keeps texting to say he can't wait to fund me.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 01, 2014's comic on:


Tags #executives, #obliviousness, #act like start up, #ask for funding, #hacker

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: We need to act more like a start-up. Dilbert: You mean we can ask for funding for one thing and then pivot six times and build something entirely different? CEO: Is there a version where we don't do any of that and I can still call myself a hacker?

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 12, 2014's comic on:


Tags #bossify, #deception, #fund ideas, #genius, #ideas, #customer support, #software, #budget approval, #delay projects, #low priority, #wise, #funding, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: You had a great idea bout upgrading our customer support software. Boss: I don't remember having that idea. Dilbert: It was genius. Boss: Well, that does sound like something I would suggest. Dilbert: We'll need budget approval, but that should be no problem for you. Boss: Duh. Obviously I'll fund my idea. It's genius. Dilbert: I'll need to delay my other project, but, as you said, those are lower priorities. Boss: I said that? Dilbert: It was very wise of you. Alice: How did you get funding for your idea? Dilbert: I had to bossify it.