Laptop Lighter Comic Strips

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110 Results for Laptop Lighter

View 1 - 10 results for laptop lighter comic strips. Discover the best "Laptop Lighter" comics from Dilbert.com.

Million Dollar Bonuses

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Million Dollar Bonuses - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #deadline, #project, #million-dollar, #recommendation, #lying, #clock, #weeks, #spirit, #bonus, #mad, #finished, #no, #laptop, #coffee

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boss: if you finish by the deadline, i'll recommend you for a million dollar bonus. dilbert: you're lying. boss: i'm serious. dilbert: but you're also lying. boss: only one way to find out. dilbert: i'd need to work around the clock for weeks to meet the deadline. boss: that's the spirit! dilbert: if you're lying about the bonus, i'm going to be boiling mad. five weeks later. dilbert: it nearly killed me, but i finished by the deadline. where's my million dollar bonus. boss: i told you i'd recommend it. they said no.

Wally Works At Home Unsafely

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Wally Works At Home Unsafely - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #warning, #unsafe, #workplace, #work at home, #remote, #live, #judging, #personality, #toxic, #dump, #lazy, #clean, #lucky, #guess, #neighbors, #curtains, #laptop

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wally on video call with catbert: catbert: i'm issuing you a warning for your unsafe workplace. wally: i work from home. you've never seen where i live. catbert: i'm judging by your personality. you're too lazy to clean anything up, so by now it's a toxic dump. wally: that's a lucky guess. catbert: and you're too lazy to close your curtains, so by now your neighbors want to murder you. wally: that's two lucky guesses.

Universe Preparing Problems

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Universe Preparing Problems - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #universe, #preparing, #problems, #anger, #laptop, #hate

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dilbert thinking in from of laptop: uh-oh. i don't seem to have any actual problems today. the universe hates it when i have no problems. it must be preparing a big one. dilbert yelling: what's it gonna be this time, universe?! carol: i'll come back.

Work From Home Or Office

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Work From Home Or Office - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #video call, #office, #work from home, #home, #quit, #shoot, #dead, #mistake, #happiness

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boss on video call. boss: how many of you would prefer going back to work in the office instead of working at home? voices from laptop: i'd rather be dead. i quit. shoot me. boss walking in living room thinking: i knew it was a mistake to let them taste happiness.

Ceo Missing

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Ceo Missing  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #covid-19, #managers & supervisors, #technology, #video call, #ceo, #pandemic, #virus, #lonely, #zoom

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dilbert on video call. dilbert: has anyone herd from our ceo since the pandemic started? voices from the laptop: maybe the virus got him. no. not me. next frame has ceo thinking in another location: well, it looks like another lonely day of looking for the zoom button.

Charles Barkley App

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Charles Barkley App - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #work, #remote, #work from home, #app, #racism, #filter, #video call, #charles barkley, #like, #laptop

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dilbert: now that we all work remotely, i built an app to eliminate racism. it's a filter that turns every face on a video call into charles barkley. dogbert: i like him. dilbert: see?

Must Register To Date

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Must Register To Date - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #love & dating, #managers & supervisors, #company policy, #human resources, #new, #dating, #register, #link, #details, #laptop

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boss on video call. boss: our new policy is that employees cannot date each other unless they register with human resources. this won't have much impact on my department because most of you are completely undatable. voice from laptop: ouch. boss: there's a link for details, but you won't need it.

Project On Hold

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Project On Hold - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #project, #hold, #opposite, #Opinion, #change, #football, #analogy, #goalpost, #fact, #laptop, #video call

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dilbert on video call. dilbert: and that's why we should put the project on hold for now. voice from laptop: hahahaha! that's exactly the opposite of what you said last week. dilbert: i sometimes change my opinions when the facts change. how do you play it? voice from laptop: now you're moving the goalposts.

Workplace Injuries

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Workplace Injuries - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #meeting, #video call, #workplace, #injury, #reduce, #work from home, #security, #guard, #hurt, #back, #steal, #office equipment

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boss on video call. boss: i'm proud to announce we reduced workplace injuries by 76% this past year. voice from laptop: we all worked from home this year. shouldn't we have seen a 100% reduction? boss: our security guard kept hurting his back stealing office equipment.

Zoom Could Have Been Worse

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Zoom Could Have Been Worse - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #embarrassment, #technology, #video call, #zoom, #time, #waste, #meeting, #imbeciles, #mic

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dilbert with dogbert on video call. dilbert: what a waste of time this zoom meeting is. i hate dealing with imbeciles. voice from laptop: your mic is on. dogbert: could have been worse.