Leadership Is Guessing Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

163 Results for Leadership Is Guessing

View 1 - 10 results for leadership is guessing comic strips. Discover the best "Leadership Is Guessing" comics from Dilbert.com.

Humans Making Decisions

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Humans Making Decisions - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #biases, #business, #data, #decision, #guessing, #human nature, #making, #primitive, #psychology, #reason, #sarcasm, #superstitions, #technology, #science

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: when humans were primitive and dumb, they used their superstitions and biases to make decisions. eventually, science won out, and we evolved to use data and reason to make decisions. dogbert: how'd that work out? dilbert: not so good. it turns out that all of our data are unreliable and conflicting. and we don't have the mental capacity to use reason. dogbert: it's still better than guessing. dilbert: how do you know that? dogbert: you are hard to talk to.

Manage With Data

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Manage With Data - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #analysis, #business, #data, #face maks, #leadership, #manage, #managers & supervisors, #paralysis, #technology, #useable

View Transcript

Transcript

boss wearing face mask: we need to manage with data! dilbert wearing face mask: do we have any useful data? boss: not really. dilbert: so...actually we need to get data before we can use data. boss: we don't have time for your analysis paralysis! dilbert: i think you're taking both sides of the same argument. you insist on using data, but you don't want to wait for data. boss: it's called leadership. you wouldn't understand. dilbert: oh, i think i do. boss: stop being such a mask hole.

Input From Idiots

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Input From Idiots - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office workers, #sarcasm, #technology, #input, #idiots, #project, #variety, #dumb, #informed, #leadership

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: per your orders, i got input on my project from a variety of people who are dumber and less informed than i am. as you might imagine, the net effect was to make everything worse. boss: are you done? dilbert: i just want to thank you for all the leadership.

Decisions Without Data

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Decisions Without Data - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #decision, #managers & supervisors, #business, #time, #compile, #facts, #guess, #career

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert with face mask: i need a quick decision on this, but i don't have time to compile the relevant facts. boss with face mask: without facts, i would just be guessing. dilbert: it won't affect your career average. boss: why wouldn't it? dilbert: let's change the subject.

Dogbert Designs Headphones

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dogbert Designs Headphones - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #design, #business, #headphones, #maximum, #customer, #annoyance, #charging, #port, #guess, #incorrect, #frustration, #fit, #customers, #ship, #user

View Transcript

Transcript

dogbert: i've designed these over-ear headphones for maximum customer annoyance. the charging port is only on one side, so the user has a fifty percent chance of guessing wrong. and the charger only fits if you put it right-side up. to increase the frustration, i made the plug look the same on both sides. best of all, the plug is so poorly designed that half the time it doesn't seem to fit, even when you put it in correctly. i made the headphones black, so you can't easily find the charger hole in low light. ninety percent of users will be cursing us every time they try to recharge. customers won't know any of this until after they purchase. boss: ship it.

Poster Of Our Values

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Poster Of Our Values - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm, #business, #poster, #values, #room, #forgot, #steal, #guess, #break room

View Transcript

Transcript

boss at conference room table: i hope you all saw the poster i put in the break room with our list of values. dilbert: i didn't see it. what are our values? boss: i don't remember. wally: are we allowed to steal? dilbert: i don't think so, but i'm guessing.

Dilbert Is Bad At Reading Faces

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Is Bad At Reading Faces - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office workers, #psychology, #over sleeping, #pancakes, #hungry

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: i'm not good at reading faces. what does that one mean? man: it means i'm mad at myself for over sleeping and having to rush to work, so i hate your guts. dilbert: oh. i was guessing it was something about pancakes. probably because i'm hungry.

Leadership Conference In Maui

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Leadership Conference In Maui - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #irritation, #managers & supervisors, #vacations

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The leadership conference is in Maui next week. I need you to sit in for me...and do your own job at the same time. While I'm drinking on the beach. Dilbert: I get it!!!

Leaders Have Differen Memories

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Leaders Have Differen Memories - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #meeting, #office, #stupid, #leadership

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss: we had a leadership meeting to decide how to move forward. the boss: but all the leaders left the meeting with wildly different ideas about what we agreed on. carol: how do you leaders plan to solve that? the boss: phase one involves accusing each other of being stupid.

Leadership And Guessing

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Leadership And Guessing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #coffee, #managers & supervisors, #office

View Transcript

Transcript

alice to the boss: one option is to use the old method that has never once worked, but we think we know how to make it work next time. alice: the other option is to try something new that we can't be sure will work. alice: it's almost as if leadership is nothing but guessing. the boss drinking coffee: let's change the subject.