Men More Perceptive Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Men More Perceptive

View 1 - 10 results for men more perceptive comic strips. Discover the best "Men More Perceptive" comics from Dilbert.com.

Boss Fired For Being White Supremacist

Thank you for voting.
Boss Fired For Being White Supremacist  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 15, 2020's comic on:


Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #racism, #fired, #employees, #white supremacist, #apathy, #career, #punch, #witness, #denial

View Transcript

Transcript

ceo: i have to fire you because employees are saying you are a white supremacist. boss: but i'm not. ceo: doesn't matter. i care more about my career than your life. boss: you're firing me just to look good? ceo: and i'll need to punch you in front of witnesses.

Wally The Generalist

Thank you for voting.
Wally The Generalist - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 24, 2020's comic on:


Tags #office workers, #sarcasm, #technology, #generalist, #subject, #matter, #expert, #help

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: wally, can you help me on this? wally: no, i'm more of a generalist than a subject matter expert. tina: what kind of work do generalists do? wally: you just saw it.

Ceo Says Coronavirus Is Hoax

Thank you for voting.
Ceo Says Coronavirus Is Hoax  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 25, 2020's comic on:


Tags #boss, #sarcasm, #suspicion, #virus, #pandemic, #hoax

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: The coronavirus is a hoax. It is no more dangerous than a common cold. Dilbert: It's almost as if you are inviting the universe to smite you. CEO: Don't jinx me! Dilbert: It's far too late.

Mumble Ventriloquists

Thank you for voting.
Mumble Ventriloquists - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 21, 2020's comic on:


Tags #anger, #boss, #meetings, #office workers, #sarcasm, #dumb

View Transcript

Transcript

Voice: That is a dumb idea, you pointy-haired fool. Boss: Who mumbled that? I can't tell with your face masks. Voice: Meetings just got a lot more fun. Boss: Who is saying that???

Dilbert Has To Upgrade Server

Thank you for voting.
Dilbert Has To Upgrade Server - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 16, 2020's comic on:


Tags #coronavirus, #business, #technology, #network, #upgrade, #server, #boss, #latency, #locks, #garage, #sleep, #face mask, #work from home

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert wearing face mask and carrying computer bag: i'm going into the office to upgrade a server. according to my boss, reducing network latency is more important than my life. can i depend on you to not change the locks while i'm gone? dogbert: only if you sleep in the garage.

Rot From The Inside

Thank you for voting.
Rot From The Inside - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 17, 2020's comic on:


Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #work, #ethic, #abysmal, #loan, #project, #hate, #rot, #idea, #raise

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: wally, your work ethic is abysmal. you're fired. wally: wouldn't it make more sense to loan me to a project you hate, so i can rot it from the inside? boss: that's not your worst idea. wally: is a raise out of the question?

Working On Vacation

Thank you for voting.
Working On Vacation - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 14, 2020's comic on:


Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #work, #vacation, #scold, #enjoy, #behind, #train, #broken

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: do you mind if i come to work on my vacation days? i hate being scolded for being behind in my work more that i enjoy taking vacations. boss: it seems i have trained you well. dilbert: no, i'm just broken.

Dilbert Did Not Say That

Thank you for voting.
Dilbert Did Not Say That  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 29, 2020's comic on:


Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #boss, #prototype, #authority, #idiot, #liar, #innocent, #guilty

View Transcript

Transcript

co-worker: why did you tell our pointy-haired boss we need to do more testing on the prototype? dilbert: i didn't do anything of the sort. co-worker: carl says you did. dilbert: who is a better authority on what i said - a guy who wasn't in the room or me? co-worker: good question. on one hand, carl is an idiot and a known liar. on the other hand, it is common for guilty people to say they are innocent. dilbert: what do innocent people say when you accuse them of stuff? co-worker: who knows? just do't do it again. dilbert under distress: i didn't do it once!!!

Personal Health Data

Thank you for voting.
Personal Health Data - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 13, 2020's comic on:


Tags #business, #laptop, #private, #data, #cloud, #asthma, #personal, #health, #edit, #disease

View Transcript

Transcript

dogbert at laptop: according to your private data in the cloud, you have a mild case of asthma. dilbert: you can see my personal health data? dogbert: see it? hahaha! i can do more than that! dilbert: what is more than that? dogbert: i can edit it. you have six new diseases now.

Ceo In Cubicle

Thank you for voting.
Ceo In Cubicle - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 26, 2020's comic on:


Tags #managers & supervisors, #business, #private, #office, #cubicle, #common, #work, #employees

View Transcript

Transcript

eco: i've decided to give up my private office and work from a cubicle so employees will respect me more. my cubicle will be 1,000 square feet, with a ceiling. dilbert: that's called an office. eco: nothing pleases you common folk.