Non Technical Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

198 Results for Non Technical

View 1 - 10 results for non technical comic strips. Discover the best "Non Technical" comics from Dilbert.com.

Experts And Non Experts

Thank you for voting.
Experts And Non Experts - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 27, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #experts, #architecture

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: the experts say our architecture is not scalable. the boss: bah! the experts are biased. i want to hear what the non-experts say. dilbert: they say we should listen to the experts. the boss: okay, how about the people who are neither experts not non-experts?

Links To Articles

Thank you for voting.
Links To Articles - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 26, 2019's comic on:


Tags #Advice, #internet, #Opinion, #research

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert the internet debate coach Dogbert: Always back up your opinion with links to articles. Asok: What if the only links I can find are from non-credible sources? Dogbert: I'll do some research. But I think that's the only kind there is.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 23, 2018's comic on:


Tags #boss, #employees, #employment, #managers & supervisors, #video games

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The job market is so tight that I had to hire this NPC. Dilbert: NPC? Boss: Non-player character. It's a video game term for a character that is programmed.As opposed to being an avatar for a human player. An NPC has limited programmed responses. Watch this. How's your day going? NPC: Not bad for a Monday. Boss: Can you help me on my project? NPC: I am too busy: Boss: What do you think of management? NPC: They are all dumb. Wally: I just bonded with that thing. Boss: See how fast you get used to it?

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 29, 2018's comic on:


Tags #valor, #awards, #bragging, #laziness

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The employee award for valor goes to Wally. During the false alarm, we noticed Wally was not with the other evacuees. He stayed behind to make sure everyone else got out. At least that's what he told us later. Wally, do you have any words of inspiration for the group? Wally: Most of you are cowards. But imagine how good you would feel winning a non-monetary award for valor. Now I ask all of you to think about how you can repay me for my selfless valor on your behalf. Dilbert: Did you sleep through the fire alarm? Wally: Most productive nap I've ever had.

The Losing Team

Thank you for voting.
The Losing Team  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 16, 2018's comic on:


Tags #blockchain, #training, #improvement, #legacy, #education, #skills

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I'd like to work on our blockchain project to keep my skills updated. Boss: I need you to be a team player and maintain our legacy systems until your technical skills become obsolete. Dilbert: What kind of team is that? Boss: You'll be on the losing team.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 28, 2018's comic on:


Tags #assignment, #deadline, #free time, #death march, #payment, #salary, #pay check, #bonus, #non caring, #cold, #heartless monster, #no sense shame, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss: I need this finished by Friday. Dilbert: This assignment will suck up 100% of my free time and turn my happy life into a f=death march. The boss: Thats why we pay you. You pay me so you can ruin my life? The boos: perhaps i said that wrong. The Boss: what I meant is that I don't care how you fell as long as I get my bonus. Dilbert: You're a cold, heartless monster with no sense of shame!!!! The Boss: That why they pay me.

Initial Coin Offering

Thank you for voting.
Initial Coin Offering  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 16, 2017's comic on:


Tags #ico, #cryptocurrency, #bitcoin, #jargon, #language

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Maybe we should do an initial coin offering, or ICO. Boss: What's that? Dilbert: It's a non-equity process for raising capital that uses a custom crypto-currency and the blockchain. I might be wasting my time here. Boss: So... it's a chain made out of coins?

Alice Forgives

Thank you for voting.
Alice Forgives - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 02, 2017's comic on:


Tags #revenge, #forgiveness, #bygones, #anger, #vindictive

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Alice, can you review this for technical accuracy? Alice: No, because six years ago you rolled your eyes when I said something at a meeting. Man: Can you forgive me? Alice: Yes. That process involves not helping you.

Product Warning Is Too Long

Thank you for voting.
Product Warning Is Too Long - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 26, 2017's comic on:


Tags #technical writer, #instructions, #caution, #warning, #safety, #criticism

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: My boss, who knows nothing about technical writing, told me to cut my 700-page product warning down to 500 pages. He doesn't appreciate my art. Dilbert: Sounds like both of you are idiots. Tina: This will go smoother if you stop talking.

500 Pages Would Be Rubbish

Thank you for voting.
500 Pages Would Be Rubbish - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 25, 2017's comic on:


Tags #writing, #criticism, #technical writer, #warning, #caution, #safety

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You need to edit the product warning from seven hundred pages down to one. Tina: Oh, that's rich. I'ma professional technical writer, and you're telling me how to write? Boss: Can you cut it down to 500 pages? Tina: Sure, if you want it to be total rubbish.