Pencil Erasers Comic Strips

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32 Results for Pencil Erasers

View 1 - 10 results for pencil erasers comic strips. Discover the best "Pencil Erasers" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 25, 2010's comic on:


Tags #director of purchasing, #ethernet switch, #pencils, #annoyed, #problem, #dinosaur

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Bob, Director of Purchasing Asok says, "I requested an ethernet switch and you sent me a box of pencils." Bob says, "Sometimes I tweak the non-standard orders so I can use our approved vendors." Asok says, "You can't tell the difference between a switch and a pencil?" Bob says, "I can tell the difference between your problem and mine."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 14, 2007's comic on:


Tags #theoretically impossible, #looped back, #mobs strip, #to- do list, #had a pencil

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Wally: "It was theoretically impossible to work this week." "Everything I needed to do required me to do something else first, until it all looped back on itself like a Mobius strip." The boss: "Maybe you could make a to-do list." Wally: "As if I had a pencil."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 18, 2007's comic on:


Tags #impulse control, #chew on pencil, #beaver, #borrowed pencil, #tree falls, #wild

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Coffee swilling Beaver Beaver: If a tree falls in the forest and no one hears it.... Id still chew the bejeezus out f it because I have no impulse control. That reminds me: the pencil I borrowed from you isn't coming back.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 09, 2005's comic on:


Tags #no budget, #no staff, #wits and computer, #wits, #pencil

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Dilbert: "I might have no budget and no staff to help me on my project, but that doesn't matter." "Because all I need are my wits and my computer." The Boss: "My computer is too slow. I'm taking yours." Dilbert: "My wits and... this pencil." The boss: "Hey, isn't that my pencil?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 14, 2003's comic on:


Tags #boss, #engineering manager, #graphic artist, #graphics guy upset, #logo, #mocks him, #puts down idea, #thinks idea, #threatned, #graphics dept.

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The Boss: Its totally Brilliant. Boss: I must show this to our creative department. I designed a new logo for the company, see what you can do with it. Graphics Artist: well, well, well an engineering manager becomes and artist. Apparently I wasted my time getting an masters degree in graphic arts and design. AlI I needed was a dull pencil and scrap of paper. Art is not that easy, you arrogant pile of perfectly symmetrical crud!! The Boss: what if the logo is inside a rectangle? Artist: SOB

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 14, 2002's comic on:


Tags #medical mel, #needle, #four feet long, #pencil, #javelin champion, #bob short, #shiskabob

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Headline: Medical Mel. Dilbert hears Mel on the phone saying, "...the needle was four feet long and thick as a pencil." Mel's voice continues, "I tried to run but the doctor had been an Olympic javelin champion." Mel's voice continues, "My new nickname at the hospital is Bob - short for Shishkabob." Dilbert covers his ears.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 03, 2001's comic on:


Tags #save money, #firings, #consultants, #flossie, #highly technical work, #invitation, #shake hands, #greeting ritual, #brain overload, #raise rates, #over reacts, #dumb woman, #lost, #freak, #new hire

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The Boss comes into Brian's cubicle and says, "I'm sorry, Brian. I have to fire all my consultants to save money." Brian turns to the Boss and asks, "Who will do your highly technical work?" The Boss brings in a woman and says to Brian, "You can transfer all your knowledge to Flossie." Brian holds out his hand to shake hands and says, "Hi." Flossie grips a pencil in her hand and says, "What's with the hand? Do you want to borrow my pencil?" Brian replies, "Um...no. This is an invitation to shake hands. It's a greeting ritual." Flossie grabs her head and shouts, "OUCH!! Brain overload!! It's too much information!!" Flossie puts both hands on either side of her head and repeats, "Purge! Purge! Purge!" Flossie stares at Brian blankly and says calmly, "Where am I?" Brian thinks to himself, "I need to raise my rates."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 28, 2000's comic on:


Tags #tape pencil, #hand, #raise, #would be unethical, #ten percent, #hiccup damage, #moral compass

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Asok the Intern watches Wally taping a pencil to the hand of The Boss who is comatose. Wally says, "I'll tape a pencil to his hand and use it to sign off on a raise for me." Asok the Intern says to Wally, "That would be so unethical... hiccup. May I have ten percent?" Wally works on getting the pencil into the comatose Boss' hand as Asok says, "That hiccup damaged my moral compass."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 10, 2000's comic on:


Tags #mapped genome, #hr dept, #had resources, #pencil, #technology, #predictions from genes, #genome, #dna, #work perfromance, #traits, #violation of rights

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Catbert approaches Wally and says, "I mapped your genome Wally." Wally replies, "I didn't know the human resources department had that technology." Catbert responds, "I used a pencil." Wally says to Catbert, "Your genes predict that you will be a bitter, lazy, caucasian guy with six hairs and poor vision." Catbert answers, "You'll hate cubicles, measurable objectives, and cats who map your genome." Wally says to Catbert, "This is a violation of my right to privacy! I'll fight it all the way to the Supreme Court." Catbert responds, "No, according to my map, you'll lose interest and fall asleep." Catbert says to Wally as he sleeps, "I wonder if this technology will ever fall into the wrong hands."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 09, 2000's comic on:


Tags #lose weight, #write down meals, #patented weight loss pencil

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Dogbert says to his client, "You can lose weight if you write down all of your meals in a journal." The man asks Dogbert, "That's all I need to do?" And Dogbert replies, "Yes, if you use our patented weight-loss pencil." The man leaves Dogbert carrying a gigantic pencil over his shoulder.