Rent Comic Strips

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15 Results for Rent

View 1 - 10 results for rent comic strips. Discover the best "Rent" comics from Dilbert.com.

What Good Is Money

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What Good Is Money - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #sarcasm, #income, #soul, #money, #earn, #rent, #own

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dilbert on couch at home: what good is earning money if it costs me my soul? dogbert: well, for one thing, it's the only way you can pay your rent. dilbert: rent? i own this house. dogbert: you really should read the things i ask you to docusign.

New Cubicles

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New Cubicles - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #cubicle

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boss: are you enjoying your new cubicles? alice: my old cubicle had a window view. my new cubicle is in a windowless room with gray walls. it's always too cold, and i'm surrounded by noisy people i dislike. i feel anxious, unhealthy, and depressed all day long. thanks to the office relocation, my life has become a rapid descent into madness. boss: on the plus side, we saved five precent in rent. no one ever likes to hear about the plus side.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #wages, #cost of living, #raise, #money, #rent, #apartment, #roommate, #space

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Asok: I need a raise because the cost of living around here is too high. Boss: Stop being greedy. I pay you plenty. Asok: I can't even afford to rent an apartment. Boss: Get some roommates. Asok: I can't afford that either. I've been sleeping on a baby changing table in a public restroom. And the janitor has been charging me $3,000 per month for that. Boss: How wide is the baby changing table? Asok: Not wide enough for a roommate. Boss: Well, I'm out of ideas.

Ceo Sits On His Wallet

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Ceo Sits On His Wallet - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #complaining, #perspective, #suffering, #competition

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CEO: I hate to complain, but it hurts when I sit on my wallet for too long. Asok: I risked an honor killing to pay my rent. CEO: This is why I hate to complain. Asok: I know a hundred ways to eat a spider.

Asok The Uber Driver

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Asok The Uber Driver - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #driver, #taxi, #ride share, #rideshare, #money, #compensation, #wages

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Asok: Today is my first day as an Uber driver. I love the flexibility! I only have to work 75 hours a week and can pay my rent. Man: With plenty left over? Asok: Are you going to finish that sandwich?

Dogbert The Product Designer

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Dogbert The Product Designer - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #annoy people, #frustration, #packaging, #product design, #sadism, #software, #torture, #product code, #engineering

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Dogbert the Product Designer. Dogbert: The main goal of product design is to annoy people for no reason. We'll start by making so much extra packaging that you need to rent a truck just to haul it away. Voice: We sell software. Man: I found the product code for downloading the software!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bitter, #unsuccessful scietists, #lazy journalists, #toddlers thrive, #pollution

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Rent a Weasel. Dogbert: "I need three bitter and unsuccessful scientists and a hundred lazy journalists." weasel: "Very good." Dilbert: "Did you know toddlers thrive on pollution?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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Dogbert's Retirement Planning Seminar "I'll show you how to spend your golden years on the golf course." "Get a job caddying for people who have better jobs than you." "Never pay rent again, thanks to the patented Dogbert breathing tube for sand traps!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #fired, #can't pay rent, #live in cubicle, #fires, #become cannibal, #regrets later

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The Boss stands in front of an employee. The employee exclaims, "I'm fired?!! Now I can't pay my rent!" The employee asks, "Would it be okay if I lived here in my cubicle?" The Boss responds, "I don't see why not." The employee asks, "Can I have fires and become a cannibal?" The Boss responds, "Well, I might regret this later......"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dogberts tech support, #hard reboot, #listen carefully, #rent a van, #dynamite, #stolen dynamite, #main relay station, #talk, #aim bazooka, #van

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Dogbert sit at a computer. Caption: "Dogbert's Tech Support" Dogbert says, on the phone "You'll need to do a hard reboot. Listen carefully." Dogbert says, "Rent a van and fill it with stolen dynamite. Park it near the power company's main relay station." Dilbert says, "Can we talk?" Dogbert wags his tail and says on the phone, "...Now aim the bazooka at the van."