Salary Increase Goodbye Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

186 Results for Salary Increase Goodbye

View 1 - 10 results for salary increase goodbye comic strips. Discover the best "Salary Increase Goodbye" comics from Dilbert.com.

Dilbert Is No Longer His Name

Thank you for voting.
Dilbert Is No Longer His Name - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 06, 2019's comic on:


Tags #boss, #gender, #managers & supervisors, #men and women, #office workers, #respect, #salary

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: My name used to be Dilbert, but my boss ordered me to identify as a woman. That way he can claim he pays men and women the same. Woman: I just lost all respect for your company. Dilbert: That was going to happen either way.

Technically Dilbert Is Male

Thank you for voting.
Technically Dilbert Is Male - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 05, 2019's comic on:


Tags #boss, #business ethics, #gender, #managers & supervisors, #men and women, #office workers, #salary

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Technically, I'm male. But my boss makes me identify as a woman so it looks as if he pays men and women the same. Dogbert: You let your boss choose your gender? Dilbert: Don't make it sound weird.

Company Pays Men More Than Women

Thank you for voting.
Company Pays Men More Than Women - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 04, 2019's comic on:


Tags #boss, #business ethics, #managers & supervisors, #men and women, #money, #relations between the sexes, #sex & gender, #salary

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: It has come to my attention that our company pays men more than women. I have been asked to correct that situation. Dilbert: You're going to cut the pay of the men, right? Boss: No, no, no. I'm only going to ask you to identify as a woman.

Wally Has Higher Income

Thank you for voting.
Wally Has Higher Income - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 21, 2019's comic on:


Tags #lying, #managers & supervisors, #money, #office workers, #bribe, #salary

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Now that I'm the boss's new pet employee, my income is higher than ever. Dilbert: I didn't realize it came with a raise. Wally: It's more of an indirect thing. Man: I'll give you $100 to tell the boss good things about me. Wally: My price for lying is $200.

Asok Moves Into A Pod

Thank you for voting.
Asok Moves Into A Pod - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 10, 2019's comic on:


Tags #employment, #finances, #home, #money, #office workers, #salary, #apartment

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: Thanks to my raise, I can afford to move out of my home in the men's restroom stall and into a pod. Dilbert: A pod? Asok: A pod! Dilbert: Is it better than the stall? Asok: It's smaller, but better appointed.

Job Has No Meaning

Thank you for voting.
Job Has No Meaning - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 20, 2019's comic on:


Tags #employees, #employment, #job, #salary, #meaningful

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: My job doesn't have meaning. Dogbert: If your employer added meaning to your job, would you agree to a cut in pay? Dilbert: No. Dogbert: I guess we just found the economic value of "meaning".

Zombie Projects

Thank you for voting.
Zombie Projects - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 28, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #zombie, #sloth, #fail, #salary

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss: wally, i'm putting you in charge of all the zombie projects that refuse to die. the boss: i'm counting on your sloth and incompetence to finish them off, so management feels comfortable finally canceling them. the boss: as of today, i'm paying you to fail. wally: actually, this is just the first time you're aware of it.

How To Reduce Turnover

Thank you for voting.
How To Reduce Turnover - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 24, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #success, #turnover, #pay

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss: i'm looking for ideas on how to reduce turnover. dilbert: maybe you could increase our pay and stop thwarting our chances for success at every turn. the boss: i'll ask someone else.

Brainwashing To Increase Sales

Thank you for voting.
Brainwashing To Increase Sales - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 23, 2019's comic on:


Tags #questioning, #brainwashing, #technology, #increase, #ethnical

View Transcript

Transcript

Sean: Our brainwashing technology had boosted sales by 900% Dilbert: But is it ethnical? Sean: Yes, it is. Yes...It...Is

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 27, 2019's comic on:


Tags #argument, #boss, #business, #change, #frustration, #managers & supervisors, #money, #salary, #company

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I can't give you a raise because you didn't accomplish anything this year. Dilbert: Are you insane? I completely redesigned our line of products!!! Boss: That was mostly last year. Dilbert: You didn't give me a raise last year because I wasn't finished until January of this year. Now you aren't giving me a raise this year because I did most of the work last year. Give me one reason I shouldn't quit right now! Boss: Because every other company is just as bad. And you don't like change. Dilbert: I said one reason!