Sarcasm Comic Strips

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95 Results for Sarcasm

View 1 - 10 results for sarcasm comic strips. Discover the best "Sarcasm" comics from Dilbert.com.

Unforseen Risks

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Unforseen Risks - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 12, 2019's comic on:


Tags #blame, #boss, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm, #risks

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Boss: How can you be sure there are no unforeseen risks with this plan? Dilbert: It is not possible to know if one has considered every risk. Therefore, we can never be sure. Boss: So...I can still blame you for any problems that pop up? Dilbert: Yes, that part of the process is still intact.

Ai That Creates Comics

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Ai That Creates Comics - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 10, 2019's comic on:


Tags #Comic Strip, #inventions, #sarcasm, #technology, #creativity

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Dilbert: I invented an A.I. that can create comic strips. Boss: Pffft! That's impossible. No machine will ever match the creative genius of human cartoonists. Dilbert: This one is about a guy who thinks his boss is dumb. Boss: No one wants to read that.

Below Average

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Below Average - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 09, 2019's comic on:


Tags #boss, #engineering, #jobs, #math, #sarcasm, #review

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Boss: Your job performance is below average. Dilbert: How did you calculate an average for a job that no one else has ever performed? Boss: Math?

Winners Never Quit

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Winners Never Quit - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 01, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm, #inspirational quotes

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the boss: i'm not having much luck with my inspirational quotes, but i thought i would try one more time. the boss: "winners never quit, and quitters never win." dilbert: when ted quit, you gave him a raise to stay. the boss: these work better when you don't think about them.

Wally And His Priorities

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Wally And His Priorities - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 28, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #meetings, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm

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the boss: wally, can you attend a meeting at 10 am tomorrow? wally: sure. here's a list of my projects so you can tell me which one you want to fail while i'm wasting my time at your meeting. the boss: was there a chance one of them would succeed? wally: well played

Counting Morons

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Counting Morons - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 24, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm, #moron

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office worker, dilbert and the boss at conference table. office worker: dilbert and i disagree on how to fix the bug. dilbert: for context, one of us is a moron, and one of us is always right. the boss: i'm confused because there are three of us here. dilbert: i forgot one moron.

Worthless Suggestions

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Worthless Suggestions - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 21, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm

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ted: i notice you didn't incorporate any of my suggestions in your final draft. ted: it's as if you are saying my ideas are worthless. dilbert: i would never say that. ted: so you're saying my ideas are good? dilbert: let's not reject ambiquity so quickly.

Chatting With The Ceo

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Chatting With The Ceo - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 03, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm, #ceo

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the boss: i saw you chatting with our eco. what was that all about? dilbert: we were talking about what a great job you do. dilbert: you believe that, right? the boss: seems plausible.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 07, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #relationships, #sarcasm

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tina: i don't appreciate the sarcastic text message you sent me. dilbert: that wasn't sarcastic. tina: yes, it was. dilbert: wouldn't i be a better authority than you about my own intentions? tina: only if i could trust you. but i can't trust you. dilbert: give me one good reason why you shouldn't trust me. tina: because you send sarcastic text messages. dilbert: um... tina: and here comes the mansplaining.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 10, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business ethics, #engineering, #government, #idea, #managers & supervisors, #math, #ocean, #research, #sarcasm, #science, #temperature, #tests

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Boss: We won a government contract to measure ocean temperatures. Dilbert: Which part of the ocean? Boss: The whole ocean. Dilbert: We can't put sensors everywhere in the ocean. It's too big. Boss: We can measure a bunch of places and estimate the rest. Dilbert: So...you want me to measure 1% of the ocean's temperature and estimate the other 99%? I don't know how to do that. Boss: Try using math. Dilbert: Wouldn't it be cheaper to measure nothing and just estimate the whole thing? Boss: Every now and then you come up with a great idea.