Silent Appreciation Comic Strips

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19 Results for Silent Appreciation

View 1 - 10 results for silent appreciation comic strips. Discover the best "Silent Appreciation" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business ethics, #taxes, #warren buffet, #tax rate, #subsidizing mansion, #condescending, #show appreciation, #ceo, #high tax, #worker

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CEO: Warren Buffett says your tax rate is higher than mine. Thank you for subsidizing my mansion, I really appreciate it. A good leader always shows appreciation to his underlings.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #pep talk, #ceo, #angry, #silent, #worry, #front, #motivation, #dumb, #hate, #bosses, #business

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The CEO pep talk CEO says, "I want to know I can count on every one of you!" CEO says, "What's wrong with these people?" Dilbert says, "Well? I fired that guy this morning. His last day is tomorrow." Boss says, "That one retires at the end of the month." The Boss says, "Those three are contractors. I didn't renew their contracts." The Boss says, "The rest of them believe that motivation is how the powerful steal from the dumb." CEO says, "Tell them I hate their guts." The Boss says, "I did that in the pre-meeting."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #brilliant, #moron, #appearance, #superficial, #beard, #silent, #Funny, #business

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The Boss says, "I invited silent Gary to help us decide on a technology direction." The Boss says, "We think he's a genius because he has a beard and he never speaks." The Boss says, "Gary, do you think we should use open source software for our support platform?" The Boss says, "Here it comes. He's rubbing his beard and giving me creepy eye contact." THe Boss says, "I detect a slight hint of disgust. It means Gary hates the idea! The Boss says, "Yes, it's all so obvious now. This is the worst idea in the history of mankind." The Boss says, "THe meeting is over. Silent Gary has spoken." Dilbert says, "You're actually a moron, aren't you?" Gary says, "Don't ruin this for me."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #appreciation, #lunch, #employee appreciation lunch, #$35 a piece, #one isn't paying, #figured out

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The boss: Okay, the bill for the employee appreciation lunch comes out to $35 apiece. Alice: That only adds up if one of us isn't paying. The boss: The employees figured out why I appreciate taking them to lunch.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #25 each, #cheap hot dogs, #cover charge, #employee appreciation day, #evil director, #harder to appreciate, #pocket money

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Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources Catbert: Employee Appreciation Day is next Tuesday. The cover charge is $25 apiece. wally: How do we know you won't buy cheap hot dogs and pocket the rest of our money? Catbert: Every day it gets harder to appreciate you." gulp gulp gulp

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #sit silent, #no meaning, #meeting, #conference room, #time is up, #something better, #no purpose, #business

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There's no purpose for this meeting other than my boss told me to have it. "So let's just sit here silently until our time is up." "Unless you have something better to do." "Not really."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #employee appreciation day

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The Boss: We're going to have an employee appreciation day on the 8th! "That's a Sunday." Alice: That's the best day for a potluck lunch. The Boss: You'll have all day Saturday to make a dish to share!" "I'll need a volunteer to organize everything. Let's see...Which one of you is the woman?" "Bring jackets. It's supposed to be about 45 degrees in the park that day." "I won't be able to attend because I do personal stuff on weekends." "Take pictures!" I hope no one else brought a pine cone appetizer."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #budget for research and development, #confidential, #witty, #appreciation, #laugh, #teeth fall out

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Alice: "Ted, what's the budget for Research and Development?" Ted: "It's confidential. I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you. Hee hee!" Alice: "I've never heard that one. It's very witty." Alice: "Allow me to show my appreciation with the following fake laugh." "HA HA HA HA HA HA!!" "HA HA HA HA HA!!!" Alice: "Those are my real teeth. I need them back."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #unwritten rule, #talked to boss's boss, #rule against, #interesting, #wonder why, #transmitting, #rules of esp, #outgoing signals, #silent, #not supposed to, #unwritten, #boss, #alice

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Alice asks, "I did what?" The Boss responds, "You talked to my boss without my permission." Alice says, "I don't remember reading a rule against that." The Boss replies, "That's because it's an unwritten rule." Alice says, "Unwritten you say? Hmm.. isn't that interesting? I wonder why it's unwritten." Alice continues, "I would think you'd be proud to write down an excellent rule such as that." Alice continues, "But if you prefer to keep transmitting rules by ESP, your skull seems to be blocking the out-going signals." Alice continues, "If you're sending a new rule now, turn your head so it can come out your ear hole."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #layoffs, #cruel to fire friday, #employee appreciation day, #employee of the month, #evil catbert

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Catbert is sitting on The Boss' desk. The Boss asks, "When should we do the layoffs?" Catbert responds, "Experts say that Friday is the cruelest day of the week to fire people." Catbert continues, "So let's do it Friday." The Boss responds, "Friday is our Employee Appreciation Day." Catbert gasps, "Ah-Ah Ah-Wooo!!!" The Boss is alarmed. He asks, "What was that?" Catbert responds, "You don't want to know." The Boss hands an award to an employee and says, "Congratulations on being named Employee of the Month." The Boss continues, "Now.. you know how some months are shorter than others?" Catbert gasps, "Ah-ah wooo!!"