Speak Comic Strips
78 Results for Speak
View 1 - 10 results for speak comic strips. Discover the best "Speak" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share August 07, 2019's comic on:
Dilbert: How's your adopted Elbonian baby doing? Wally: I had to give it back. It was a lot needier than I expected. Dilbert: Was the baby a boy or a girl? Wally: How would I know? It couldn't even speak yet.
Share May 16, 2019's comic on:
the boss: i didn't believe you were a spy for the elbonian government until you denied it the wrong way. the boss: you were slow to speak, and you blinked. dilbert: that isn't evidence of anything. the boss yelling: you blinked again!
Share May 11, 2019's comic on:
the boss: does anyone have an idea for fixing our communication problem with marketing? dilbert, alice, wally and asok thinking: must...not...speak or else he will assign the project to me. the boss: i saw your eye twitch. the project is all yours. alice: GAAAA!!! visually upset
Share January 16, 2019's comic on:
Share November 28, 2018's comic on:
Asok: I keep working hard, but no one notices. Wally: That's why I send out department-wide emails at around midnight every night. Asok: I didn't know you work at home every night. Wally: Do I need to speak slower here?
Share November 16, 2018's comic on:
Dilbert: We need to change one of the links on our website. Boss: Pull together a study team, do a focus group, get buy-in from all departments, and present it at the next division meeting. Dilbert: I changed it while you were yammering. Boss: Let us never speak of this again.
Share October 25, 2018's comic on:
The Boss: I watched a Ted talk yesterday about how idiots don't know they are dumb. Alice: For the sake of my career, I hope you change the subject as soon as possible. The Boss: Did you know idiots believe they are smart? Alice: Must... Not... Speak...
Share August 11, 2018's comic on:
Performance Review The Boss: I've seen a lot of employees in my day, and you are definitely one of them. Ted: Are you saying generic things because you don't know what my job is or how well I performed? The boss: And... You speak truth to power. Ted: Please stop.
Share February 11, 2018's comic on:
The Boss: Dilbert, I need you to wear this harazzmat suit when you meet with Tina. Tina will also be wearing a harazmatt suit. The suits will prevent you from trying to harass each other. You won't be able to speak directly. A radio inside the suit will transmit your words to our human resources department. Human resources will scrub your sentences of any inappropriate content before delivery. Dilbert: Doyon wear a harrazzmat suit when you talk to Tina privately? The Boss: No, but she wears three of them.
Share March 19, 2017's comic on:
Dilbert: What's the URL for the test site? Boss: Ask Amy. Dilbert; Amy is a mumbler. I can't understand a word she says. Boss; Just ask her to speak up. Dilbert: I've tried that. All she does is mumble louder. And whenever I ask her a question by email, she answers the wrong question. If the only person who knows the URL for the test site is Amy, we probably need to build a new site and tell someone else the URL. Amy might be the most useless employee in the entire company. Wally: Can you teach me to mumble? Amy: Mumble, mumble, mumble. Narrator: Get your own system.