Search Results for "supervisor"
Share April 01, 2017's comic on:
Alice: I spent the past week fixing a critical bug in the software that I forgot to tell you about. Boss: In a way, it's like you never existed. Alice: No, it's not like that at all. Boss: And you have a bad attitude on top of all that.
Share January 22, 2012's comic on:
Dogbert: This is Dogbert's tech support. How many I abuse you? Boss: I think my digital modem is broken. Dogbert: Please hold while I pretend to be testing it. Okay, it looks fine from here. The problem must be in your wiring. You'll have to rip out all of the wiring in your entire house to locate the problem. Boss: Are you sure? Because the lights on the modem aren't even on. Dogbert: That means you have moisture on your internal wiring. You'll also need to replace all of your plumbing and get a new roof. Boss: May I speak with your supervisor? Dogbert: Sure. But he sounds exactly like me.
Share April 04, 2009's comic on:
Overqualified temp Asok the intern says, "It's funny that you're a Rhodes scholar yet you can only find work as a temp." Asok the intern says, "I am only an intern and yet I enjoy the power and prestige of being your supervisor." Asok the intern says, "In retrospect I shouldn't have challenged her to a cage fight."
Share February 12, 2009's comic on:
Dilbert says, "There's an opening in my old department is it okay if I apply?" Collections supervisor says, "Sure. I'd be happy to toss that dead cat In someone else's backyard." Dilbert says, "I was worried that I might be too valuable?" Collections supervisor says, "Why are you still here?"
Share October 02, 2008's comic on:
Cow supervisor A cow says, "Try not to think of me as a cow who happens to be your supervisor." The cow says, "Think of me as your bovine overlord, the usurper of your position in the food chain." Dilbert says, "I'd be lying if I said that didn't make it feel kind of cool." The cow says, "Say you'd die for me!"
Share October 01, 2008's comic on:
The cow supervisor A cow says, "I overcame a lot of bias against cows to get this job." The cow says, "People think that a cow with strong leadership skills is just a jerk." The cow says, "Is that what you think, baldy? Huh? Do you? Do you?" Wally says, "Um... I'll say no."
Share September 30, 2008's comic on:
An Elbonian says, "I assure you that your new Elbonian management will not discriminate against non-Elbonians." Someone says, "Doesn't your belief system hold that all non-Elbonians are on the same level as livestock?" The Elbonian says, "Someone is starting off on the wrong hoof with his new supervisor."
Share December 10, 2006's comic on:
"This is Dogbert's tech support. How may I abuse you?" "I get an error message every time I open an application." "Try giving me all of your personal information and then checking into rehab." "Then I'll have someone steal your identity and move in with your wife." "There's a good chance that the new guy will know how to fix your computer." "When you get out of rehab, talk your wife into taking you back." "Then never touch your computer again because it hurts the ones you love." "How's work?" "Everyone wants to talk to my supervisor."
Share August 31, 2005's comic on:
"Are there meals on this flight?" "Yes, if you're a cannibal." Elbonia Airlines "That is not funny. After this flight, I'm going to complain to your supervisor." "Can you put me next to the plump guy?" "Sure. He's in B8."
Share January 19, 2005's comic on:
The Boss: Tina, this is your new supervisor, Nelson. You'll be training him to be your boss. The Boss: There won't be any bonuses this year because i gave it all to nelson. he's a man, sio he needs to support a family. Nelson: Im gay The Boss: Um....civil union and adoption, right? Nelson: Im dating a rugby team.