Unholy Allaince Comic Strips
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Boss: This doesn't feel right. Dilbert: It came straight from our lawyer. Boss: It just feels wrong. Can you research it a little more? Dilbert: Sure. I can do that research in my head. Let's see... our lawyer got his degree at Harvard and has twenty years in this exact field. Whereas you have a "feeling" that is probably the result of an unholy combination of greasy food and ignorance. The data clearly favors the Harvard Law degree over the cheeseburger. ... Good luck. He's in a bad mood.
Wally says, "I propose an unholy alliance." Carol says, "You have my attention." Wally says, "Reserve every meeting room under my name for the year. That way you won't need to do any scheduling, and I won't need to attend any meetings." Wally says, "Don't panic; that strange feeling is you falling in love with me." Carol says, "It feels like I'm eating cheese!"
Dogbert: I'll need more than tall pants and traditional looking hair to get elected to president. "I'm hoping to form an unholy alliance with the military industrial complex." "You're willing to attack allies?" Dogbeert: "It's the highest R.O.I."
Wally is driving to work. He thinks, "I have a vague feeling of uncertainty." At work Wally thinks, "It gets stronger at the office." Wally loses his balance and thinks, "The uncertainty saps my strength. My suitcase is getting heavier." Wally crawls on the floor and says, "Must.. get... to... cubicle." Wally leans back in his chair. He thinks, "The uncertainty feels like a piano on my chest." The Boss looks in on him. The Boss says, "I decided to reorganize... or downsize, unless there's a merger." Wally waves his arms about. Wally says, "I summon the unholy demons of Apathy, Sarcasm, and Cynicism!" Wally is surrounded by devils and demons. He says, "Good thinking! Reorganizations always increase profits!" The Boss thinks, "Wow. Third time today."
A man with a goatee and a woman with spiked hair who's wearing a tube top enter a room with Dilbert. The man says, "Our strategic alliance is working well. My company provides amazing technical skill and your company . . ." The man continues, ". . . Has a seemingly endless supply of three-ring binders." They sit at a conference table. Dilbert says, "Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated." The woman asks, "Is it true that if your name is written in a binder you lose your soul?"
Dilbert stands in front of the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "You'll head our technology alliance with a small Silicon Valley start-up." The Boss continues, "Their corporate culture is a bit different from ours. Try to be flexible." Dilbert and a man with a goatee and a ring through his head sit at a conference table. Dilbert opens his briefcase and says, "I've never seen a pierced brain before." The man puts his bare feet on the table and says, "I think I'll call you 'Mister Conservative.'"