Unrelated Comic Strips
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View 1 - 10 results for unrelated comic strips. Discover the best "Unrelated" comics from Dilbert.com.
magazine salesman: our publication is considering naming your company one of the best places to work. on a totally unrelated topic, our sales team will be contacting you about buying lots and lots of advertisements. boss: and if we don't? magazine salesman: who would want to work at a company that makes such bad decisions?
Ted: Your plan is dumb because it reminds me of something different that didn't work out. Dilbert: Being reminded of unrelated things is not a form of thinking. Ted: History repeats. Dilbert: Then how does something new ever happen?
Dilbert: Our new politeness policy forbids me from giving you an honest opinion of your idea. So, instead, I will talk about an unrelated topic and you can draw your own conclusions. So... did you hear about the manure fire that burned down a pig farm?
Tags #capitalism, #cruelty, #executives, #industry & manufacturing, #manufacturing, #meat, #announcements, #artificial meat prodcut, #automated robots, #senior management, #manufacturing employees, #engineering
CEO: The company has two exciting announcements. We are launching a new artificial meat product. In unrelated news, our manufacturing plant is now fully automated by robots. Wow. It got quiet in here. Dilbert: I don't want to say we have no trust in senior management, but... did you order the robots to kill all of the manufacturing employees and turn them into a meat product? CEO: Before I answer that, can we agree that capitalism has some rough edges?
Boss: Talk to Allen about this. Dilbert: I'll need an exit strategy. He's a serial talker. I'll be trapped for hours while he strings together infinite, unrelated stories. Boss: Engineers have weird problems. Dilbert: What could I eat that would make me puke in ten minutes?
Jury selection Dogbert says, "You with the big eyebrows, are you as dumb as you look?" A man says, "I'm not sure. I don't remember what I look like." Dogbert says, "Okay, you're in. And on an unrelated noted, I'm the only person who ever loved you."
"Management is pleased to announce that it has a plan to make your pension fun solvent." "In unrelated news, the guidelines for workplace safety have been relaxed." "Our CEO reminds you that smoking is cool."
The Boss: Our new VP of Marketing has twenty years of experience in an unrelated industry. "But he assured me that technology is the same as shampoo." "I predict smooth sailing." New VP: "Technology? I though you said astrology."
Alice: "I got your three-page e-mail, and I brought you a gift." "It's a clump of blank space. You can use it to separate long, rambling, unrelated sentences." "Next week I'll introduce you to a little curvy thing that I call a comma."