Writing Book Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

255 Results for Writing Book

View 1 - 10 results for writing book comic strips. Discover the best "Writing Book" comics from Dilbert.com.

Three Dogberts

Thank you for voting.
Three Dogberts - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 07, 2020's comic on:


Tags #business, #Dogbert, #marketing, #plan, #clone, #singularity, #event, #book

View Transcript

Transcript

dogbert on desk with three dogberts behind him: i've got three dogberts working on your marketing plan, but even that isn't enough. i'd bump it up to five dogcarts, but then we risk creating a singularity event. boss: i don't get it. dogbert: read a book.

Wally Writes Fiction

Thank you for voting.
Wally Writes Fiction - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 25, 2019's comic on:


Tags #budget, #business, #managers & supervisors

View Transcript

Transcript

wally: i decided to try my hand at writing fiction. i like writing fiction because it doesn't require any research. i can literally make up a story out of nothing. i feel sorry for nonfiction writers. they have to get the facts right. but a fiction writer only has to use imagination. i can make any wild assumptions about the future that i want. boss: i asked you here to talk about your budget forecast. wally: that's what i was talking about.

Fly On Weekend

Thank you for voting.
Fly On Weekend - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 15, 2018's comic on:


Tags #boss, #business, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #evil, #cheap

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I need you to do a customer site visit. Book your flight for the weekend so you don't miss any work. Dilbert: I'm impressed by your casual evil. Boss: Bring your own food.

Wally's Doctor Note

Thank you for voting.
Wally's Doctor Note - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 05, 2018's comic on:


Tags #boss, #doctors, #employees, #excuses, #work, #writing

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Here's the note from my doctor that you asked for. Boss: I can't read the handwriting. Wally: That's how you know it's a real doctor's note. Boss: What's it say. Wally: It says I need lots of sleep at work.

Dogbert's Time Management Book

Thank you for voting.
Dogbert's Time Management Book - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 29, 2018's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #time, #management, #time management, #blank

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: Would you like to read my book on time management? Dilbert: Yes. These pages are blank. Dogbert: I just saved you three hours.

We Need To Talk

Thank you for voting.
We Need To Talk - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 20, 2018's comic on:


Tags #contradiction, #argument, #disagreement

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The software upgrade will be ready by Friday. Dilbert: Actually, that's when we will start writing it. Boss: And it will save us twenty million dollars. Dilbert: Actually, it will cost a million dollars and save nothing. Boss: We need to talk. Dilbert: We do? I'm not feeling that.

Monster Puts People In Boxes

Thank you for voting.
Monster Puts People In Boxes - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 02, 2018's comic on:


Tags #managers, #monster, #insult

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol: I'm writing a horror novel. It's about a horned monster who puts people in boxes and makes them do meaningless work while insulting them. Boss: That sounds great. Carol: The monster is also very dumb.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 18, 2018's comic on:


Tags #sociopath, #obliviousness, #tell-all

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: There's a new tell-all book about our company. CEO: How bad is it? Dilbert: It's bad. Anonymous sources within the company say you're a "raging sociopath with the intellect of a clam." CEO: Put out a press release denying those lies! Dilbert: That's going to be tricky to write. CEO: Just say I deny being a sociopath with the mind of a clam. Also say I hope whoever said that about me dies a slow and terrible death. Is that clear? Dilbert: Yes, on many levels.

Doctor And Dopamine

Thank you for voting.
 Doctor And Dopamine - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 15, 2017's comic on:


Tags #addiction, #impulse control, #social media, #twitter, #facebook, #pharmaceuticals, #drugs, #gambling, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Doctor: The MRI shows that your brain has been hijacked by dopamine pirates. You are now under the full control of social media corporations, gambling casinos, and big pharma. Boss: Are you writing me a prescription? Doctor: No, I'm buying stock in those companies.

Product Warning Is Too Long

Thank you for voting.
Product Warning Is Too Long - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 26, 2017's comic on:


Tags #technical writer, #instructions, #caution, #warning, #safety, #criticism

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: My boss, who knows nothing about technical writing, told me to cut my 700-page product warning down to 500 pages. He doesn't appreciate my art. Dilbert: Sounds like both of you are idiots. Tina: This will go smoother if you stop talking.