Search Results for "20% more money"

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.
Notice: Too many results returned for your search. Displaying the first 1000 most relevant results.
1 - 10 of 1000

Ceo Makes More Money In Stocks

Thank you for voting.
Ceo Makes More Money In Stocks - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 28, 2017's comic on:

Tags #rich people, #money, #stock market, #investments, #out of touch, #obliviousness, #stratification

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: Hey, our stock is up two percent. I just made more money than you'll earn in your entire life. Remind me, do I leave you a tip?

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 18, 1994's comic on:

Tags #resources vailable, #common employees, #more money, #project, #all gone, #hypocrite boss, #no time

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: "Although I'm technically the 'Boss' I believe it's my job to make resources available to you, the common employees." Dilbert: "I need more money for my project." The Boss: "Sorry, all gone." Dilbert: "Maybe I'll get on your calendar so we can discuss it." The Boss: I've got twenty minutes next summer."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 01, 1994's comic on:

Tags #fired, #hired back, #other people are smarter, #wally is dumb, #boss is dumb, #more money

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Wally? I thought you got fired. Wally: I did. But people outside the company appear smarter, so they hired me back as a consultant for way more money. wally: Did you understand that? Don't feel embarrassed to ask for help on the hard stuff.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 20, 1994's comic on:

Tags #dress codes don't apply, #fireing, #hire back, #more money, #reverence package, #telecommute, #two weeks vaction

View Transcript

Transcript

"Great news -- You're fired!" "You get a generous severance package, two weeks' vacation, AND we hire you back as a contractor for more money!!" "And I can telecommute if I want, but since dress codes don't apply to me..." "Aargh!" "Bonk, Bonk"

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 10, 1995's comic on:

Tags #increase budget, #training, #leave the company, #more money, #competitor, #down side

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally stands in front of the Boss's desk. Wally demands, "You've got to increase the budget for training!" The Boss responds, "If I train you, then wouldn't you just leave the company to make more money working for our competitor?" Wally says, "I guess there is a downside." The Boss asks, "And the downside would be . . . ?"

View more books now

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 08, 1996's comic on:

Tags #peer performance, #reviews, #limited budget, #raises, #slander coworkers, #more money, #weasel boy, #hate empoyees

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Dilbert and Wally, "It's time to do peer performance reviews!" The Boss continues, "Remember, there's a limited budget for raises. Your best strategy is to slander your co-workers so there's more money for you!" Wally says to Dilbert, "I plan to say very nice things about YOU." Dilbert replies, "Nice try, weasel boy." The Boss thinks as he walks away, "Managing is easy when you hate the employees."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 15, 1994's comic on:

Tags #pretending, #personal lives, #interested, #management technique, #job satisfaction, #more money, #boost intangible benefits, #chisel away, #salaries, #families, #wife divorced, #job lowers self esteem, #attract mate, #said hello

View Transcript

Transcript

"Hi guys, how are your families?" "?" "?" "Why are you pretending to be interested in our personal lives?" "It's a management technique to increase your job satisfaction without giving you more money." "My plan is to boost your intangible benefits while continuing to chisel away at your salaries." "But enough about me...how are those families of yours?" "My wife divorced me because you make me work so many hours." "This job lowers my self-esteem too much to attract a mate." "Tell them I said 'hi'."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 28, 1995's comic on:

Tags #putting in charge, #biff, #big improvements for free, #recommend ways, #increase profit, #spend mpney, #make money, #more money, #so called, #report tomorrow, #lava lamps, #few bucks

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss enters Dilbert's cubicle and says, "I'm putting you in charge of project 'BIFF.'" The Boss says "'BIFF' stands for 'Big Improvements For Free.'" The Boss says, "Your job is to recommend ways to increase profits without spending money or changing anything." Dilbert says, "You have to spend money to make money." The Boss says, "If we HAD money to spend we wouldn't need to MAKE money. Duh." Dilbert says, "The point is that you can make MORE money than you spend." The Boss says, "I'm not following your so-called 'point.'" The Boss says, "Logically, anything I don't understand is unimportant. Have your report tomorrow." The Boss sits at his desk, holding Dilbert's report. The Boss says, "So, you recommend . . . Replacing all managers with lava lamps." Dilbert reaches into his pocket and says, "Here's a few bucks for the lava lamps."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 31, 2000's comic on:

Tags #20% more money, #hire someone, #loyal, #40% more, #science, #mime, #wall blocks

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is in the boss's office and he says to the boss: "Another company offered me twenty percent more. Will you match it? The boss answers: "No, I prefer to hire someone who is loyal, even if I have to pay forty percent more." Dilbert shakes his hands looking angry and says: "Managing is supposed to be a science!" The boss holds up his hands in front of him and says: "My mime wall blocks your sound."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 01, 2000's comic on:

Tags #more money else where, #good coffee, #why stay

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to Dogbert over a cup of coffee: "I know I could earn more money at another company. So why do I stay?" Dogbert says: "Maybe the coffee is good and you enjoy watching the antics of feeble, unaware loosers." Dilbert begins to say: "No, I don't think that's..." But Dogbert, finishing his cup of coffee, cuts him off with: "This coffee is good."