50 Dollars Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

206 Results for 50 Dollars

View 1 - 10 results for 50 dollars comic strips. Discover the best "50 Dollars" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #rolex watch, #corporate limit, #vendor gifts, #limit 50 dollars

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is sitting at his computer. Wally walks up pointing to his watch. Wally says, "Look at the 'Rolex' watch I got from a vendor." Dilbert says, "Do you know there's a corporate limit of fifty dollars for vendor gifts?" Wally says, "Sure." Dilbert says, "And you know that's a maximum not a minimum?" Wally says, "Ooh. Maybe that's why he whined when I took it off his arm."

Top Dilbert Searches

marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dogbert research, #small dog, #with glasses, #bureau of dogs, #50 dollars, #file complaint

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert Research Co. Dogbert says, "First question: What would you losers do if a small dog with glasses took advantage of you?" A man shakes his fist and says, "We would complain to the... um... whoever handles that sort of thing!" The woman says, "Yeah!" The man shows up at the "Bureau of Dogs." He says to Dogbert, who sits behind a desk earing a turban, "It costs fifty bucks to file a complaint?" Dogbert says, "And ten bucks to borrow a pen."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business ethics, #stock market, #hedge fund, #million dollars, #insider trading, #algorithm, #winning trades, #create algorithm, #eat fiber, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: I'll pay you a million dollars a year to work at my hedge fund. I'll do the insider trading and you pretend you created an algorithm that makes winning trades. Dilbert: What if I actually create the algorithm? Dogbert: Sure, and maybe you can eat fiber and make gold, too.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #actions & defenses, #billion dollars, #business ethics, #golden key, #rich people, #top 1%, #flying unicorn

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Here's a billion dollars to settle your claim of discrimination against short, bald, nearsighted guys. Wally: I'm in the top 1% now. I wonder where we hold our secret meetings. Boss: Ask the tiny flying unicorn with the golden key.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #prosperity, #saving & investment, #portfolio, #standard industry, #investing, #billion dollars, #index funds, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: I'll manage your portfolio for a standard industry fee of 1% per year. Wally: I'm investing a billion dollars. Your fee would be $10 million per year. Dogbert: Those index funds aren't going to pick themselves.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #arm, #doctor, #dollars, #against, #mine, #Word, #treatment, #malpractice

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits on an examining table holding his arm. A man with a stethoscope says, "You're healthy. That's fifty dollars." Dilbert says angrily, "You haven't even looked at my arm!" The man says, "Who's the doctor here?" Dilbert replies, "Apparently, neither of us." The man says, "Right. So it's just your word against mine."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #lenin, #twenty, #bucks, #king, #commies, #available, #stores, #dollars, #wall, #communism

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert walks down the sidewalk and a man standing against a building whispers, "Pssst! Dog! Would you like to purchase Lenin's body?" The man continues, "Twenty bucks. He's in great shape . . . The king of commies . . . Not available in stores." Back at home, Dogbert pushes a man's body against the wall. Dilbert asks, ". . . And you talked him down to ten dollars?" Dogbert asks, "Do you like it better against this wall?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #television, #show, #healing, #dollars, #send, #money, #trick, #hair

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert asks Dogbert, "What did you do to your hair?" Dogbert's hair is styled in a pompadour. Dogbert replies, "It's for my new television show, 'Healing for Dollars.' People send more money if you have this kind of hair." A man and a woman sit on a couch watching Dogbert's tv show. The woman says, "It might be a trick." The man replies, "That's what I thought until I saw his hair." Dogbert says, "Checks or money order."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #healing, #dollars, #psychic, #power, #prevent, #millions, #pimples, #neighbor

View Transcript

Transcript

On his television program, Dogbert stands in front of a curtain and holds a microphone. Dogbert says, "Welcome to my show, 'Healing for Dollars.'" Dogbert continues, "Today I will use my psychic healing power to prevent millions of people from getting pimples on their tongues." A man and a woman sit on a couch sticking their tongues out. As they watch their tongues, the woman says, "Ith working! Get the theckbook!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #looking, #hit, #man, #eliminate, #inventor, #million, #dollars, #deliver, #head, #platter, #tupperware, #lettuce, #crispers, #loses, #drama

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits across from a man behind a desk. Dogbert says, "I heard you're looking for a hit man to eliminate an inventor named Dilbert." Dogbert continues, "For a million dollars I can deliver his head on a platter." The man asks, "Does it have to be on a platter?" Dogbert replies, "I've tried using those Tupperware lettuce crispers, but it loses a lot of the drama."