A Way To Copy Comic Strips
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782 Results for A Way To Copy
View 1 - 10 results for a way to copy comic strips. Discover the best "A Way To Copy" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday July 06,
1999
Tags #strategic plan, #everyone supports, #a way to copy, #images, #piece of paper
Transcript
A balding man with extreamly long hair and beard sees Alice in the hall. Bearded man says, "I did it!" Bearded man says, "It's a strategic technology plan that everyone supports." ALice smiles. Bearded man says, "If only there were a way to copy images from one piece of paper to many." Alice frowns.
Friday April 22,
2011
Tags #cruelty, #office workers, #mindless task, #intern, #time, #little value, #jump out, #nice way to say
Transcript
Dilbert: Asok, there's no nice way to say this... do this mindless task for me because you're nothing but an intern and your time has very little value. Asok: There probably was a nice way to say that. Dilbert: It didn't jump out.
Saturday May 07,
2011
Tags #computers & peripherals, #embarrassment, #process order, #middle ages, #stinging sarcasm, #faxed copy, #1950's, #happy time, #bob in procurement
Transcript
Bob In Procurement Dinosaur: I need the signed original contract to process your order. Dilbert: Because we're in the Middle Ages? Dinosaur: Ouch! Your stinging sarcasm has embarrassed me into saying I will accept a faxed copy. Are we good now? Dilbert: Absolutely. Because the 1950s is a happy time.
Saturday January 14,
2012
Tags #babies, #complaining, #human resources, #evil director, #discriminates, #short, #bald, #near sighted, #born this way, #business
Transcript
Wally: My boss discriminates against me because I'm short, bald, and near-sighted. It's not my fault. I was born this way. Woman: And who is this little... whoa! Hello. Catbert: evil director of Human Resources. Literally.
Wednesday September 27,
1989
Tags #comrade, #dogsky, #electronic, #secrets, #soviet man, #microfiche, #hard copy, #cripple, #empire, #evil
Transcript
Dogbert walks down a sidewalk and a man in a trenchcoat says, "Pssst . . . Comrade Dogsky. Will you sell your master's electronic secrets to nice Soviet man?" Dogbert asks, "Will you be wanting them on microfiche or hard copy?" Back at home, Dilbert asks, "You're going to cripple the WHAT?" Dogbert, who is carrying plans, replies, "Evil empire. Trust me on this."
Thursday July 30,
1992
Tags #Dogbert, #ratbert, #copy, #newsletter, #clueless, #people, #situation, #conversational, #geometry
Transcript
Dogbert says to Ratbert, "Ratbert, I brought you a copy of the 'Dogbert Clueletter,' the newsletter for clueless people." Ratbert replies, "No thanks. I used to be clueless but I turned that situation around 360 degrees." Ratbert reads the newsletter, "Dogbert's clues to conversational geometry."
Monday March 01,
1993
Tags #Dilbert, #Wally, #tim, #writer, #famous, #memo, #february, #boss, #performance, #review, #copy, #typo
Transcript
A man says to Dilbert and Wally, "Hi, I'm Tim Zumph, writer of the famous memo of February third, 1978 . . ." Tim continues, "I remember it so clearly. My boss walked right up and said 'Nice memo, Tim.' And it wasn't even time for my annual performance review." Tim shows them a document and says, "I still keep a copy with me." Wally points at the memo and says, "Typo . . ."
Monday December 05,
1994
Tags #japanese model, #copy best practices, #long term investing, #boss sings shaft
Transcript
The Boss and Dilbert sit at a table. The Boss says, "We've studied the Japanese model and decided to copy their best practices." Dilbert says, "Long term investing?" The Boss holds up a microphone and yells, "Karaoke!" The Boss stands on the table and sings, "Shaft! Can you dig it?" Dilbert looks at the reader and says, "Thank God we don't have lifetime employment."
Friday December 23,
1994
Tags #telemarketing, #bid to run, #telemarketers pay themselves, #rip[ off people, #old people, #no way to lose
Transcript
Dogbert sits across from the Boss's desk. He hands the Boss a document and says, "Here's my bid to run your telemarketing company. Basically, it's no cost to you." Dogbert continues, "My telemarketers pay themselves. If they get a feeble-minded person on the phone they charge them triple and pocket the difference." The Boss says, "There's no way I can lose." Dogbert says, "Don't answer your home phone for a few weeks."
Wednesday March 15,
1995
Tags #stock, #shares, #timely leaks, #media, #value plunged, #sell now, #fair share price, #want copy, #Entertainment
Transcript
Dogbert sits at a conference table with the Boss and three other managers. Dogbert says, "Your stock was $30 per share when I offered to buy the company, but thanks to some timely leaks to the media your value has plunged." Dogbert continues, "However, if you sell right now I'll pay the full $30 for your stock." The Boss says, "I recommend we do it." A manager hands the signed contract back to Dogbert and says, "Done. $30 per share is more than fair." Dogbert replies, "Yeah, 'per share' would have been fair. Anybody want a copy?" The Boss looks shocked.