Agenda Comic Strips
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30 Results for Agenda
View 1 - 10 results for agenda comic strips. Discover the best "Agenda" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday April 24,
2011
Tags #fraternization, #joking, #agenda, #know anything, #important he is, #like his jokes, #late for dinner, #jokes, #table, #meeting, #laughter, #business
Transcript
Boss: The first thing on the agenda... Dilbert: Hold on. I don't know anything about this guy. Boss: What's the difference? Dilbert: I need to know how important he is. Should I pretend to like his jokes? Should I nod in agreement no matter what he says? Man: You can call me anything. Just don't call me late for dinner. Dilbert: Ha ha ha ha ha!! I hope I didn't waste that.
Saturday December 17,
2011
Tags #gadgets, #suspicion, #new smart ohone, #no truct, #own agenda, #paranoid, #recharge me, #threats from phone
Transcript
Boss: I don't trust my new smartphone. It understands spoken language. That's creepy. I think it has its own agenda. Catbert: You're being paranoid. Boss: Recharge me now or so help me jobs I will delete your contacts.
Wednesday August 26,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #meeting, #agenda, #specific, #emotional, #statements, #work
Transcript
Dilbert, Ted and a woman sit at a conference table. Ted says, "Thank you all for coming. There's no specific agenda for this meeting . . ." Ted continues, "As usual, we'll just make unrelated emotional statements about things which bother us. I'll kick it off . . ." Ted throws his head back and yells, "There's never time to get any work done around here!!"
Wednesday January 20,
1993
Tags #Dilbert, #Wally, #the boss, #agenda, #discussion, #paper, #recycling, #program, #drawback
Transcript
The Boss, Dilbert, Wally and a woman sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "First on the agenda is a discussion of the company's new paper recycling program." Dilbert looks at the agenda and says, "We talked about that last time . . . Hey, this is last week's agenda." The Boss replies, "You spotted the one drawback."
Monday September 26,
1994
Tags #saint dogbert, #priority matrix, #agenda
Transcript
"I invited Saint Dogbert to bludgeon anybody who strays from the agenda into something stupid." "That reminds me of the productization of our Tiger Team's priority matrix." "Actually, that was on the agenda." "Oops. Carry on."
Monday October 02,
1995
Tags #posted for success, #huge earnings, #market share, #agenda, #raises difficult year, #united way, #two agenda items, #oopsie
Transcript
The Boss, Carol, Dilbert and Wally sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "We're poised for success. We expect huge earnings and increased market share!" Looking at a document, the Boss says, "Next on the agenda . . . There will be no raises because it will be a difficult year . . ." The Boss says, "Carol, I thought I told you to put the 'United Way' update between those two agenda items." Carol says, "Oopsie."
Sunday September 08,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #meeting, #copy, #agenda, #wrong, #awkward, #leave, #casually, #problem, #economy, #deeper, #interest, #rates, #cover, #dark
Transcript
Dilbert enters a conference room and asks, "Is this the meeting?" People at the table mumble a response. Dilbert says, "Good." A man says, "Everybody take a copy of the agenda." Dilbert reads the agenda and thinks, "I'm in the wrong meeting . . . Now it's too awkward to leave." Dilbert thinks, "I'll casually stretch my arms, flick the lights off and escape under cover of dark." Dilbert turns the light off. Several people say, "Ouch!" Five people lie on top of each other in the doorway. The man says, "Oh, sorry, wrong agenda." Dilbert arrives at home wearing tattered clothing. He tells Dogbert, "I'm starting to think that the problem with our economy is deeper than high interest rates."
Saturday May 17,
1997
Tags #agenda, #project meeting, #two hours, #temporaily sane, #repeat mission statement
Transcript
Carol hands Alice a document and says, "Alice, here's the agenda for the next project meeting." Alice shouts, "Two hours?!! Aaagh!!! There's only ten minutes' worth of tasks!!" Alice thinks, "Uh-oh. I think I'm temporarily sane." Carol says, "Try breathing into a paper bag and repeating our mission statement."
Monday July 21,
1997
Tags #agenda, #ubr, #first job, #crash dummies, #spent a fortune, #unfocused boss rambling
Transcript
Dilbert passes out paper to The Boss and Wally. The boss has a pencil and Wally has a coffee mug. Dilbert says, "Here's the agenda. The first hour will be U.B.R., as usual." The Boss sits at the conference table with Wally and Alice. He says, "This reminds me of my first job, before crash test dummies were popular. man, I spent a fortune on aspirin." Alice asks Dilbert, who has his feet up on the table, "What exactly is U.B.R.?" Dilbert answers, 'Unfocused Boss Rambling. Only 58 minutes to go."
Tuesday January 27,
1998
Tags #deputy of common sense, #four hour meeting, #behind schedule, #agenda, #morale is low
Transcript
During a staff meeting, Dogbert stands on the table holding his gun and says, "FREEZE!!" Dogbert is dressed as a policeman and says, "You scheduled a four-hour meeting to find out why people are behind schedule!" The guy says, "No, look at the agenda! The fourth hour is about why morale is so low. A woman next to him whispers to Dogbert, Shoot him."