Agree To Rules Comic Strips
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Dilbert says to Dogbert, "You've got to step down as King of Elbonia. These people are capable of making their own decisions." An Elbonian says, "The Paper-Rock-Scissors Olympics are canceled. We couldn't agree on the rules." The Elbonian continues, "And of course, we all wear mittens . . ." Dogbert asks Dilbert, "What was your point?"
Dilbert standing next to Wally, who's sitting at his computer terminal. Dilbert says, "Wally, as you know, employees must share hotel rooms at the conference..." Dilbert continues, "So I was wondering if you'd like to...you know...be my roomie." Wally responds, "Sure." Dilbert says, "We'll have to agree on some rules." Wally replies, "I can only spoon on my right."
dilbert: if i follow all of our internal rules, my project will fail because of delays. and if i don't follow the rules, you will fire me. what should i do? boss: i like the option where the project is a success but you're a failure.
boss: our internal audit found that you violated over four hundred company rules in the past year. dilbert: i'm also the only employee who accomplished anything last year. now connect the dots. boss: so you're saying we need more rules.
Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the desk. Dogbert says, "I've decided to write down all of the so-called 'unwritten rules.'" Dogbert looks at a piece of paper and says, "So far I have 'Don't phone after ten p.m.' and . . . Uh . . ." Dilbert asks, "That's it?" Dogbert asks, "How about 'Don't throw porcupines in a balloon store?'"
A member of the Senate Judiciary Committee says, "Mister Dogbert, do you realize that if confirmed for the Supreme Court . . ." The senator continues, "It would be improper to pursue your stated goal of conquering the world and enslaving all humans?" The senator next to him is asleep and snoring. Back at home, Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on the hassock. Dilbert asks, "You withdrew?" Dogbert replies, "Apparently there are all these 'unwritten' rules."
"You're not welcome here, Cat. It's against house rules to eat Ratbert." "My work here is not done until I have pounced on my natural enemy." "Who are you, and what are you doing on my keyboard?"
Dogbert sits at his desk and a businessman sits across from him. Reading from a document, Dogbert says, "I'll invest up to five million dollars if you'll agree to some standard conditions." Dogbert continues, "I will be chairman of the board and own 99% of the company. You will work for free and wash my car twice a week." The businessman asks, "Can I mow your lawn instead of washing your car?" Dogbert answers, "You're a tough bargainer, but I prefer multimedia developers for my gardening needs."
Dilbert sits on the couch reading with one knee bent. Dogbert stands on the cushion next to him. Dogbert says, "I'm retiring from my media empire and putting my vast wealth into real estate." Dogbert continues, "My plan is to buy all the property on earth and evict everybody who doesn't agree to be my puppet." Dilbert asks, "Can I be Kermit?" Dogbert hands Dilbert a document and says, "That's a 'Muppet.' It's all spelled out in your lease."