Search Results for "andy the android"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 02, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #andy, #android, #Dogbert, #andy the android, #annoying, #imitate, #human, #behavior

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Dilbert: My android works! Andy: Hi. I am Andy the android. I am designed to rapidly analyze and imitate human behavior. Dilbert: This could be annoying. Andy: I know you are, but what am I?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 06, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #andy, #android, #computer, #absurdity, #existential crisis

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Andy the Android: As an android, I wonder how humans cope with the absurdity and utter futility of their meaningless lives. Was it something I said?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 03, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #andy, #andy the android, #live, #Dogbert, #bored

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Andy: As an android, I will live forever. Ha ha ha! I'm bored.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 05, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #practiced, #Religion, #attained, #fulfillment, #soul, #creature, #andy the android

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Andy says to Dogbert, "I have practiced religion for one day and not attained fulfillment." Dogbert responds, "That's because you're an android. You have no soul." Andy asks, "No soul?" Andy asks, "What is a little creature with no soul supposed to do?" Dilbert responds, "Well, Sonny Bono married Cher . . ."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 04, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #andy the android, #humans, #sleep, #eat, #don't, #die, #existential, #crisis

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Andy: Androids want to be like humans. Tell me what humans do. Dilbert: Mostly, they eat, sleep, and hope they don't die. Andy: That's it? Dilbert: Unless they find religion... Then they eat, sleep, and look forward to dying.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 16, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #android, #civilization, #aliens, #radish-like

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Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dogbert asks, "Did you ever get to thinking that maybe you are just an android, placed on earth by an advanced civilization of huge radish-like aliens who are studying your every move?" Dilbert answers, "No." Dogbert says, "Me neither."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 01, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #android, #kit, #walk, #talk, #dress, #differently, #Dogbert, #around

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Dilbert assembles an android and says to Dogbert, "I built this android from a kit." Dilbert continues, "He doesn't have a personality, but he will walk around and talk." Dogbert says, "Well, I hope you guys will at least dress differently."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 02, 2012's comic on:


Tags #gadgets, #mobile (cell) phones, #time travel, #rumour, #apple phone, #20 pixel camera, #picture of thoughts, #time machine, #future, #most handsome man, #android phone

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Dilbert: I heard a rumor that Apple's next phone will have a 20-megapixel camera. Topper: That's nothing! I heard you'll be able to hold the phone to your head and take a picture of your thoughts. And even that's nothing. Their next phone will be a time machine! Future Topper: Here I am from the future! I'm the most handsome man in the universe! Topper: So am I! Wally: He makes a good case for buying an Android phone. Both Toppers: I love me more than me. Topper hijack

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 21, 2006's comic on:


Tags #executives, #hierarchy, #invisible, #managers, #status, #underling, #steering committee, #tall memebers, #senior menagement, #acknowledge exitence

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"Asok, I want you to attend the technology steering committee for me." "But they are all tall members of senior management. They won't even acknowledge my existence." "Phfft." "Hey, Andy, this seat is free. I'll just move my coffee."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 24, 2008's comic on:


Tags #director of the green, #director of something else, #screwing up

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The Boss says, "Andy has been appointed our director of green." Dilbert says, "Director of green? How do you get a job like that?" Andy says, "You start by being the director of something else and screwing it up."