Applied Flawed Logic Comic Strips
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Dilbert tells the Boss as he hands him a document: "I did the analysis using your bad assumptions." He continues as the Boss examines the document: "Then I applied your flawed logic and arrived at your predetermined answer." Dilbert asks the Boss: "Shall I begin disillusioning the team?" The Boss says about the document: "This needs a pie chart."
The Boss says, "I need you to delete all of the unnecessary data from our servers to make room." Dilbert says, "Technically it's all unnecessary because our decisions are always based on flawed logic anyway." The Boss says, "Can you pretend some of it is necessary?" Dilbert says, "Sure. Can you pretned I deleted the stuff that isn't?"
Man: Your email was ignorant and arrogant. Dilbert: How do you know it isn't just a reading comprehension problem on your end? Let's use logic to see which one of us is right. Bad decision 2. Bad decision 3.
Dilbert sits at his desk looking at his computer. Dilbert says, "I have become one with my computer." Dilbert continues, "It is a feeling of ecstasy . . . The perfect blend of logic and emotion." Dilbert says, "I have reached . . ." Dogbert says, "Nerdvana."
Zimbu the Monkey sits at his desk working on the computer. Dilbert says, "It's time to end this charade, Zimbu!" Dilbert continues, "Your language skills are simple rote behavior. Monkeys are incapable of logic and reasoning." Dilbert looks at the computer screen and says, "Ha! And that program you're writing -- it's probably in 'Basic.'" Zimbu asks, "Do you ever work?"
Dogbert: I've become a doomsday prophet so I can scare gullible people. Im telling everyone the world will end in year 2000. My compelling logic is that 2000 is a big round number. Dogbert: Its BIIIG and ROOUND Dilbert: Stop it!!!
Dilbert: "I've never seen you do any real work around here, Irv. How do you get away with it?" IRV: "I wrote the code for our accounting system back in the mid-eighties. It's a million lines of undocumented spaghetti logic." DILBERT: "It's the Holy Grail of technology!!" IRV: "You boys may find a little extra in your envelopes this month."
"Dogbert: Ethics Advisor" "We know our products are killing people, but we're claiming the studies are flawed." "We're planning to focus our advertising on the youth markets in poor urban areas." "So, given all that, is it okay for me to steal office supplies?" "I'd have to say yes."
Dogbert says to Dilbert who is sitting at his desk, "I think the best way to pursue my goal of world domination is to become a talk radio host." Dogbert continues, "I'll promote my unique conservative viewpoint that people are idiots who deserve to be mocked." Dilbert asks, "Won't people show your viewpoint to be flawed by virtue of their intelligent questions?" Dogbert asks, "Like that one?"
Dogbert and Dilbert walk through the park. Dilbert asks, "Do you think people are basically good or evil?" Dogbert replies, "Well, I know dogs are basically good." Dogbert continues, "And dogs are better than people." Dogbert continues, "But people are better than cats." They sit down under a tree. Dogbert continues, "And cats are evil . . ." Dogbert continues, "Therefore, all people are stupid." Dilbert says, "I don't follow that logic." Dogbert says, "Yes, my theory predicts you would say that."