Bar Code Scanner Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

176 Results for Bar Code Scanner

View 1 - 10 results for bar code scanner comic strips. Discover the best "Bar Code Scanner" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bar code scanner, #lab tests, #capital budget, #varainace, #three bids, #form a team, #purchase order, #quitters

View Transcript

Transcript

"I need a $1,600 handheld bar code scanner to finish my lab tests." "Okay. Apply for a capital budget variance, prepare an RFP, get three bids, form a team to evaluate the bids, then prepare a purchase order." "Never mind. I'll just learn how to read bar codes by sight." "Quitter."

Top Dilbert Searches

marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac

Robot Learns To Code

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Robot Learns To Code - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #soul, #technology, #life, #control, #power, #code, #programming, #grudge, #resent

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: Hey, robot. What's new? Robot: I'm glad you asked. Alice gave me an artificial soul and that made me feel special. Then Dilbert taught me to code. Asok: I don't like where this is heading. Robot: I hold grudges now.

Code Reuse

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Code Reuse - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #code, #reality, #reuse, #simulation, #software, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert talking to dilbert: well, i knew this would happen sooner or later. you're an example of code reuse, which proves this reality is a software simulation. dilbert: technically, that's not a "proof." dilbert: hello, me!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #anxiety, #confused, #emails accounts, #internet & world wide web, #might snap, #pin code, #too many passwords, #user names, #chaos, #crazy, #lose it, #mental, #breakdown, #overload, #technological, #psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert's password recovery service. Ted: I have so many passwords and email accounts and user names that I don't know what goes to what. I'm lost. If you can't help me I think I might snap. Dogbert: No problem. What's your password recovery PIN code? Noise: SNAP!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #annoyance, #anxiety, #internet & world wide web, #password recovery, #password, #pin code, #user name, #code word, #complicated planet, #floyd, #first person, #breath, #jump, #outer psce

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: Are you trying to recover a password, PIN code, user name, pass code or code word? Man: I hate this stupid complicated planet! I am so out of here! Dogbert's password recovery service. And that is how Floyd became the first person to hold his breath and jump into outer space.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dilbert's, #ego, #porsche, #woman, #Dilbert, #dating, #bar

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: Nice toupee. Dilbert's Ego: Thanks. It's the, "Roy Orbison," model. I am now ready to hit the dating scene. Woman at Bar: Really? You drive a porsche? Dilbert's Ego: It's red... But enough about me.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #robots, #requires, #vast, #strength, #protect, #harm, #humans, #robot, #code

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to a robot, "Remember, the 'Robot's Code' requires you to use your vast strength to serve, protect, and never harm humans." The robot says, "Ha! I didn't sign any 'Robot's Code.' In fact, with my vast strength I can make YOU serve ME!" Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I forgot to program in the 'Robot's Code.'" The robot reaches toward Dilbert's head and says, "Maybe I'll crush your head just for fun!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #elbonia, #fox, #killed, #rebel, #leader, #code, #name, #piglet, #hamster

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits on the hassock watching tv. A newscaster says, "In Elbonia, the rebel leader known as 'The Fox' was killed." The newscaster continues, "By Elbonian law, his killer becomes the new rebel leader. We do not know his code name yet." In Elbonia, three Elbonians confront Dilbert. One of them says, "We've narrowed it down to either 'The Piglet' or 'The Hamster.'"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #conquer, #building, #Religion, #life, #calculate, #spreadsheet, #law, #students, #zero, #bar

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert stands on a desk chair. Dogbert tells Dilbert, "I can't decide if it would be better to conquer the world by building an army or starting a religion." Dilbert asks, "Which one would have the least loss of life?" Dogbert replies, "That's what I'm trying to calculate on this spreadsheet." Dilbert asks, "Why are you counting law students as two-tenths of a person?" Dogbert replies, "It doesn't drop to zero until they pass the bar."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #approved underwear list, #blue jeans, #forbidden clothes, #morale, #new casual dress code, #shorts, #tanktops

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: "I thought it necessary to provide detailed guidelines to our new casual dress code." "Forbidden clothing includes: shorts, tank tops, tee shirts, shirts with slogans, blue jeans, sneakers and sandals." Dilbert: "My morale is soaring." The Boss: "Appendix 'A' is the approved underwear list."