Become Invisible Comic Strips
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197 Results for Become Invisible
View 1 - 10 results for become invisible comic strips. Discover the best "Become Invisible" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday May 20,
2000
Tags #performance review, #weaknesses need improvement, #become invisible, #blurry, #multitasking, #too often
Transcript
The Boss asks Dilbert, "Do you have any weaknesses that need improvement?" Dilbert replies, "Sometimes I work so fast that I become invisible." Dilbert goes on to say, "If I seem blurry right now, it's because I'm multi-tasking." The Boss thinks to himself, "Once a year is way too often for this."
Wednesday May 21,
2003
Tags #power to become invisible, #sit home, #get paid, #Wally, #boss, #hiding
Transcript
Wally and Asok are eating lunch. Wally says, "Long term, I hope to convince our boss that I have the power to become invisible." Wally continues, "Then I can just sit home and get paid. Oh, it will be sweet." The Boss is sitting at his desk, he looks scared. He asks, "Wally? Is that you?" Wally is hiding behind The Boss' chair. Wally replies, "Right in front of you."
Monday July 29,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #psychologist, #invisible, #healthy, #juan, #cindy, #lecturer
Transcript
Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert stands on the hassock. Dogbert says, "I've decided to become a pop psychologist and lecturer." Dogbert continues, "My theory is that you can blame all of your problems on invisible people." Dilbert replies, "That doesn't sound healthy." Dogbert says, "Don't blame me. Talk to Juan and Cindy."
Saturday February 28,
2015
Dogbert The Product Designer
Tags #design, #evil, #frustration, #product designer, #torture, #hate people, #styrofoam debris, #invisible buttons
Transcript
Dogbert: I decided to become a product designer because I hate people. I will fill every package with styrofoam debris and affix hard-to-remove stickers all over the cases. I'll make the buttons invisible by making them black on a black surface. Ha ha ha! Dilbert: I've always wondered how this stuff happens.
Thursday August 30,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #hardware, #store, #invisible force, #therapy, #psychiatrist, #selfish, #feelings, #talking
Transcript
Dilbert lies on a couch and explains to a therapist, ". . . Whenever I'm near a hardware store I feel an invisible force drawing me inside . . ." The psychologist says, "You've been talking about yourself since you got here. We never talk about ME and MY feelings. I hurt too, you know." Dilbert says, "I'm paying $75 an hour . . ." The psychiatrist says, "Good Lord, and you think that makes it okay to be selfish??"
Saturday December 29,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #makeup, #invisible, #talking, #blind, #date
Transcript
Dogbert asks Dilbert, "How was your blind date?" Dilbert replies, "She wore too much makeup . . . And I had to do all the talking." Dogbert says, "Maybe she's a mime." Dilbert says, "That would explain her invisible dog."
Friday August 02,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #eliminating, #simple, #caused, #people, #invisible, #juan, #cindy, #kill, #them, #motivational, #speaking
Transcript
Dogbert stands on a stage holding a microphone. He says to the audience, "The Dogbert method of eliminating guilt is quite simple." Dogbert continues, "All of your problems are caused by invisible people named Juan and Cindy." Dogbert continues, "All you have to do is find them and kill them."
Wednesday May 03,
1995
Tags #sex after marriage, #depraved practice, #liberals, #headaches, #fatigue, #become consultants, #extinction of mankind, #right winger
Transcript
Dogbert sits in a radio DJ booth wearing headphones and speaking into a microphone. He says, "Today we're talking about sex after marriage. Many liberals support this depraved practice but I do not." Dogbert continues, "It can lead to headaches, fatigue and unwanted family members who become consultants." A caller asks, "Wouldn't your philosophy lead to the extinction of mankind?" Dogbert replies, "Cry me a river, Liberal."
Monday August 14,
1995
Tags #dehumanization, #weekly status, #doubt exostence, #invisible, #pager buzzing, #batteries
Transcript
Dilbert, Wally and the Boss sit at a conference table. Dilbert says, "My status for the week is that the ongoing dehumanization from my job has caused me to doubt my existence." As he waves his hands in front of Wally's face Dilbert continues, "There is reason to believe I am becoming invisible." The Boss asks Wally, "Do I hear your pager buzzing, Wally?" Wally replies, "I doubt it; I don't keep batteries in it." Dilbert disappears with a "plink."
Tuesday August 15,
1995
Tags #dehumanization, #invisible to humans, #fix, #wear a bag, #perfect solution, #hear you
Transcript
Dilbert stands in front of Dogbert waving his arms. Dilbert says, "The dehumanization of my job has rendered me invisible to humans. Only you can see me, Dogbert." Dilbert asks, "How can we fix this?" Dogbert replies, "You could wear a bag on your head when you're around me." Dilbert clenches his fists and answers, "That's not the fix I had in mind." Dogbert responds, "It's not a perfect solution. I'd still be able to hear you."