Search Results for "being a manager"

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.
1 - 10 of 615

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 14, 1999's comic on:

Tags #being a manager, #less condescending, #wrong, #performance evaluation, #laughter, #Catbert, #boss

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss is sitting in his office and Catbert is sitting on the boss's desk. Catbert says to the boss:"Being a manager means never having to be less condescending just because you're wrong." Both Catbert and the boss laugh out loud: "Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha" Carol is sitting at her computer and Dilbert is standing behind her holding a folder. Dilbert says to Carol: "Did he finish my performance evaluation?" Carol answers: "I heard him working on it."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 14, 1992's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #transferred, #assignments, #management, #yanking, #chain, #over-communicating, #manager, #sales

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss says, "Dilbert, you're being temporarily transferred to the field sales organization." The Boss continues, "Normally we use these assignments to round somebody out for management. But in this case I'm just yanking your chain!" Dilbert says, "You're over-communicating again, sir." The Boss continues, "Plus, I hate the manager of sales."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 06, 1996's comic on:

Tags #manager ted, #planned better, #pushed down stairs, #soul left body, #evil entity, #performance reviews

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss pokes his head into Ted's office and asks, "How do you like being a manager, Ted?" Ted replies, "Yesterday my staff pushed me down ten flights of stairs. My soul left my body and now I'm a lifeless evil entity." The Boss says, "Just in time to do performance reviews!" Ted responds, "I couldn't have planned it better."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 03, 2001's comic on:

Tags #manager, #alice, #big favor, #pillow, #kidding, #struggle

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally asks Alice, "How do you like being a manager, Alice?" Alice says to Wally, "Do me a big favor; sneak into my house tonight and smother me with a pillow." Dilbert says, "I think she was kidding." Wally says, "I'll see if she puts up a struggle."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 22, 2012's comic on:

Tags #honesty, #managers & supervisors, #leader, #manager, #bad managers, #hinesty, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I see myself as more of a leader than a manager. Catbert: That's what all bad managers say. I'm just being honest. Boss: That's what all jerks say.

View more books now

Manager Of The Year Award

Thank you for voting.
Manager Of The Year Award - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 23, 2015's comic on:

Tags #attendance, #manager, #management, #laissez faire, #cause and effect, #award, #accolade

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: Employees voted you "Manager of the Year." As usual, this honor is going to the manager with the worst attendance. We're hoping it's more of a correlation than a causation thing.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 22, 2011's comic on:

Tags #managers & supervisors, #secretaries (office), #work ethic, #filling in for boss, #workstation vacation, #being in charge, #pverarted, #martini glass, #drinking, #umbrella in drink, #secretary, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice says, "I'm filling in for your boss this week, and I need twenty copies." Carol says, "That's not how it works. When he's out of the office I take a workstation vacation." Alice says, "I don't like being in charge." Carol says, "I hear it's overrated."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 17, 2011's comic on:

Tags #test phase, #meeting, #desk, #production phase, #being smart, #good feeling, #confident, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert:you scheduled the end of the test phase after the start of the production phase. we're feeling confident. Dilbert: ist too bad that being smart doesn't come with some sort of good feeling like that.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 10, 2011's comic on:

Tags #executives, #meetings, #Dogbert, #consulting, #facebook, #china, #irrelevant, #breakout groups, #fantasize, #being relevant

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert Consults Dogbert: "Where does your company fit on this comprehensive list?" Facebook, China, Irrelevant Dogbert says, "Now let's form breakout groups to fantasize about being relevant."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 22, 2011's comic on:

Tags #lawyers & attorneys, #legal advice, #chain reaction, #future visionary leader not being born, #maintenance agreement, #stabbing gandhi

View Transcript

Transcript

Company Lawyer Dilbert says, "I need your legal advice." Lawyer says, "There's a risk that this could cause a chain reaction that results in a future visionary leader not being born." Dilbert says, "It's just a maintenance agreement." Lawyer says, "It's like stabbing Gandhi."