Beta Trial Comic Strips
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35 Results for Beta Trial
View 1 - 10 results for beta trial comic strips. Discover the best "Beta Trial" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday April 14,
1994
Tags #project dew drop, #test report, #explodes, #beta trial, #friendly customers, #killed, #friendly ones, #project ducky
Transcript
The Boss: I agreed to ship Project 'Dewdrop' to some customers for beta testing. Dilbert: Didn't you read my test report? Dewdrop explodes when you plug it in. The Boss: we'll limit the beta trial to friendly customers. Dilbert: we killed all the friendly ones with project ducky.
Friday April 15,
1994
Tags #delay, #beta trial, #exploding, #engineers, #pessimists, #foucs, #positive aspects, #trial, #hassle, #non disclosure, #agreements
Transcript
"You've got to delay the beta trial with customers until we figure out why it keeps exploding!" "You engineers are such pessimists. Just once, try to focus on the positive aspects of the trial!" "We won't need to hassle with 'non-disclosure agreements'."
Tuesday November 25,
2014
Launch Beta In Two Months
Tags #credibility, #lying, #truth, #beta version, #laughing, #problem
Transcript
Dilbert: And I plan to launch the beta version in two months. Group: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Dilbert: I have a credibility problem. Dogbert: And I should believe that?
Wednesday January 08,
2020
Trial Postponed
Tags #business, #trial, #court, #stupidity, #judge, #dare, #lawyer, #postponed
Transcript
dogbert: your trial at the court of stupidity has been postponed. the judge is suffering from a gavel-related injury. dilbert: did you attack him with a gavel? dogbert: didn't need to. the man can't say no to a dare.
Monday February 13,
2012
Tags #hats, #inventions, #brainwave reader, #nearest computer thoughts, #blurry image, #video, #beta version, #video quality
Transcript
Dilbert: My brainwave reader invention can control the nearest computer with my thoughts. Boss: Why am I seeing a video of a blurry image that looks like you slapping another blurry thing that looks like me? Dilbert: I don't think it's fair to complain about the video quality of the beta version.
Monday March 09,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #smell, #suspected, #stopped, #neighbor, #cat, #trial, #pat, #pet
Transcript
Dilbert arrives at home carrying a briefcase. Dilbert asks, "How was your day, Dogbert?" Dogbert sniffs the air and asks, "Hey! What's that smell?" Dogbert smells Dilbert's hand and says, "Just as I suspected - you stopped to pet the neighbor's cat!" Dilbert says, "It meant nothing. It was more of a pat than a pet." Dilbert dials the phone and says, "Save your lies for the trial."
Friday March 13,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #petimoney, #trial, #Dogbert, #suit, #hadeas corpus, #lo contendre, #latin, #club
Transcript
At the petimony trial, Dilbert says, "Your honor, I request that Dogbert's suit against me be dropped . . ." Dilbert continues, ". . . On the grounds that there's no habeas corpus, no lo contendre, and no e pluribus unum." Dilbert looks up at the bench and thinks, "With luck, he doesn't know Latin either." The judge says, "Bailiff, club this man."
Saturday January 09,
1993
Tags #Dogbert, #school, #technology, #microwave, #timer, #fool, #beta, #imbeciles
Transcript
Dogbert asks the class, "Can anybody show me what you do with a microwave?" A man opens the microwave and says, "I insert the video tape . . . Then I set the timer for ninety minutes . . ." A cloud of smoke comes from the microwave. Dogbert asks, "Does anybody know why it isn't working?" A man says, "The fool! It's Beta!"
Friday September 24,
1993
Tags #judge, #Dogbert, #trial, #alice, #temp worker, #Wally, #jury
Transcript
Dogbert says to the members of a jury, "Yes, my client did accidentally slay a 'temp' worker . . . Emphasis on 'TEMP.'" Dogbert asks, "But who among us can say they haven't slain innocent people when the situation called for it?" The judge replies, "I can." Dogbert says, "Well, great . . . So much for getting a fair trial."
Friday November 10,
1995
Tags #beta prodcut, #fix problems, #logically impossible, #schedule, #manager, #not engineer
Transcript
The Boss and Dilbert sit at a conference table. The Boss asks, "How long will it take to fix any problems we find in our beta product?" Dilbert answers, "It is logically impossible to schedule for the unknown." The Boss says, "Try to think as a manager, not as an engineer." Dilbert says, "In that case, we'll fix the problems before we find them."