Bob In Procurement Comic Strips
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192 Results for Bob In Procurement
View 1 - 10 results for bob in procurement comic strips. Discover the best "Bob In Procurement" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday July 28,
1995
Tags #bob procurement, #duties are simple, #assume employees lie, #multimedia laptop, #demo labeler, #low cost substitutes, #savings, #accomplishments
Transcript
His boss in procurement explains to Bob the Dinosaur, "Your duties are simple. People will come to you and ask for things." Bob's boss continues, "Assume all employees are lying, treasure-hunting thieves. Give them low-cost substitutes and claim the savings on your accomplishments." An employee says to Bob, "I asked for a multimedia laptop PC. This is a 'Dymo' labeler." Bob responds, "Nice try, Paul, if that's your real name."
Saturday May 07,
2011
Tags #computers & peripherals, #embarrassment, #process order, #middle ages, #stinging sarcasm, #faxed copy, #1950's, #happy time, #bob in procurement
Transcript
Bob In Procurement Dinosaur: I need the signed original contract to process your order. Dilbert: Because we're in the Middle Ages? Dinosaur: Ouch! Your stinging sarcasm has embarrassed me into saying I will accept a faxed copy. Are we good now? Dilbert: Absolutely. Because the 1950s is a happy time.
Thursday July 27,
1995
Tags #bob, #self esteem, #improve, #job, #opening, #procurement dept, #hit people, #with tail, #prevent desired computers, #business
Transcript
Bob the Dinosaur sits on Dilbert's couch with his head down. Dilbert tells him, "Bob, your self-esteem might improve if you got a job." Bob replies, "As what?" Dilbert says, "There's an opening in our procurement department. You'd be perfect." Bob asks, "What does procurement do?" Dilbert replies, "Their job is to prevent us from getting the computers we want." Bob asks, "Can I hit people with my tail?"
Saturday July 29,
1995
Tags #bob in procurement, #approved equipment list, #approved list, #more work, #alleged test, #philosophy, #bob the dinosaur
Transcript
Wally is in Bob the Dinosaur's office. Bob says, "I'm afraid the equipment you want is not on the approved equipment list." Bob continues, "Let me think . . . if I add this to the approved list, that's more work for ME . . . but if I say no, it's more work for YOU . . . hmm . . . think, think . . ." Wally says, "I'd like to see this alleged list." Bob replies, "Well, it's not so much a physical list as it is a philosophy."
Saturday July 22,
1989
Tags #Dilbert, #dinosaur, #carnivore, #joke, #bob
Transcript
Dawn the Dinosaur says to Dilbert, "Let's make a deal. You let us continue hiding in your house, and Bob won't hungrily devour you." Dilbert replies, "That's fair." Dilbert continues, "But I'm puzzled . . . I know that Dawn can avoid being seen because she is a Nobodysaurus, but how on earth did Bob go unnoticed all this time?" Bob points to his sneakers and says, "Tennies." Dawn says, "Old dinosaur trick."
Thursday February 08,
1990
Thursday June 07,
1990
Tags #bob, #dawn, #dogberts, #security, #neutralize, #motives, #accident, #dinosaurs, #cult
Transcript
The caption says, "Bob and Dawn join Dogbert's cult." Dogbert says to Bob and Dawn the Dinosaurs, "You two are in charge of security." Dogbert continues, "Your job is to neutralize anybody who questions my motives." Dawn says, "Actually, we have some questions of our own . . ." Dawn asks, "Or should we just neutralize ourselves?" Dogbert replies, "Make it look like an accident."
Friday June 08,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #dawn, #bob, #dinosaurs, #cult, #trucks, #questioning
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. Dawn and Bob the Dinosaurs asks, "Uh . . . Dilbert, could we get your advice?" Bob says, "We just joined Dogbert's new cult." Dawn says, "And he ordered us to kill each other for questioning him." Dilbert says, "Hmm . . . Maybe you could just shove each other in front of trucks."
Saturday June 09,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #dinosaurs, #dawn, #bob, #mesmerized, #oratorical, #skill, #evil, #cult
Transcript
Bob the Dinosaur asks Dawn, "How did we ever allow ourselves to be drawn into Dogbert's evil cult?" Bob continues, "Maybe he has strange hypnotic powers. Maybe we were mesmerized by his oratorical skill." Dilbert says, "It says here you have brains the size of a walnut." Bob asks, "What's your point?"
Tuesday June 12,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #cult, #dinosaurs, #earth, #leader, #bob, #dawn, #kicked out
Transcript
Bob the Dinosaur says, "Dogbert, we've come to resign from your cult." Dawn says, "You can't push us around anymore." Dogbert is wearing a crown. Dogbert replies, "Resign?!! Ha! You're unworthy! I kick you out. The cult doesn't need your type!" Bob begs, "Nooo!! Take us back!!! Please!!!" Dogbert says, "I think this explains why dinosaurs don't rule the earth."